The Outspoken Mom Blog

Dangers today

Good Morning Everyone!

So, I was just sitting here...yep, just sitting instead of doing something and wondering to myself...why all of a sudden does it seem we are FINALLY addressing our sick and disgusting eating habits in America?

There is a new show coming on TV that will be addressing what our schools feed our children, what we are feeding our children and how it is killing us.  Their opening tag line on their commercials shows a bunch of children running and says, "This is the first generation in history that has a shorter life expectancy than their parents". 

We are just starting to figure this out now?!!  It is gross how we feed our children, I am a firm believer that our bad eating/feeding habits are a major contributor to our children having higher and higher rates of not only the obvious things like high cholesterol, diabetes, heart disease but, also things like food allergies, ADD/ADHD and Autism.  We are constantly shoving chemicals into these teeny bodies without thinking twice about it and we are slowly killing our children!

Have you ever tried to read the side of a macaroni and cheese box?  Have you read the ingredients in a can of pop, any pop?!  Have you read what is in your salad dressing, your ketchup?  Now, check out supposedly 'healthy' foods...check out your label on your dry roasted peanuts, peanut butter, even your rice mix box.....NOW...check your label on your baby formula...prepared to be sick.

You will find things like MSG, corn syrup, partially hydrogenated oils, etc...all are so unhealthy for adults let alone children! 

Just a couple reasons why you don't want to eat some of those foods.....

Corn Syrup/High-Fructose Corn Syrup:  corn syrup stops the body from absorbing copper..which is essential in production elastin and collagen.  The main source of copper?  Liver and we don't feed our children THAT anymore for sure due to chemical issues of it's own!  Corn syrup also acts more like a fat to our body than sugar and it decreases our body's ability to recognize when we are full.

I could go on and on and on about corn syrup but, you can do some research yourself, just do a search and read just a couple items about it.  I will tell you we have had 2 different doctors who are helping us treat our son for Autism say and I quote both of them: "If you don't pull anything out of your son's diet, just pull corn syrup."..the other, "Get him and keep him off corn syrup, it WILL kill him, especially in large amounts."

MSG, also known as Mono sodium Glutamate has been a danger for years however, I have noticed it creeping back into many foods lately....What is wrong with MSG?  Well, here goes:  it can cause cardiac issues from palpation to arrhythmia's to extreme drops in blood pressure.  It can cause digestive problems, depression, dizziness, loss of balance, mood swings, headaches, migraines, ADD, behavior issues in children especially, and eye problems just to name a few of the problems.  Our Federal Government has repeatedly refused to recognize years of research dating all the way back to the 60's and continues to allow food companies to NOT put MSG on their labels including in ORGANIC foods!

I would love to touch on the oils issue here too but, the children are awake and I need to get them ready for school.

Here are just a sample of websites that can help you learn more about these foods, I just gave you a taste of some of the issues with them....

http://www.truthinlabeling.org/index.html

http://www.truthinlabeling.org/adversereactions.html

http://www.menstuff.org/issues/byissue/highfructose.html

http://www.lef.org/magazine/mag2008/dec2008_Metabolic-Dangers-of-High-Fructose-Corn-Syrup_01.htm (by the way...this particular doctor is one of the ones working with us on our son, I had no clue she had an article out about corn syrup...I just happened to find this in my search!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pp0nc4kY-tc

http://www.treelight.com/health/nutrition/PartiallyHydrogenatedOils.html

Blessings to you all and keep those babies healthy! 

-Liza

End of a season....yet just the beginning!

I have a few minutes before I need to get the 3rd child ready for school today so, I thought I would take the time to write a little something.

First let me say, "Rain, rain go away.  Come back as SNOW!"  It is the beginning of March, it is NOT supposed to be raining...especially since this is the last week the ski slopes are open and we haven't skied in 3 weeks!  Bummer, looks like our skiing is done for another season.

Our whole family, sans the baby had a great time skiing this year.  I even hit the slopes more this year than all the times in my whole life.  I had a blast and even though I am no where near ready to hit the mountains or even the supposed 'black diamond' runs of our local hills, I had a great time being out there with my family and friends.

Skiing is truly one of those sports the whole family can do together and you don't all have to have the same skill level.  My husband is what I consider 'Pro' and is truly majestic to watch come down the slopes.  My son is new to the aerial team this year and amazes me as I watch him go over jumps and start to do turns in the air....WOW is the only word for watching your son do something like that.

Then my 2 older daughters, they are finding pure joy in skiing backwards, going off the course and skiing through the trees and over bumps and they have even started to venture onto the terrain park and tried some jumps and turns.  Next year one says she is going to join the racing team and the other says she wants to do the freestyle team with brother.  Either way, it brings me great joy to watch my children growing and developing in a sport that they can truly do for the rest of their lives.

I thought I would be sitting in the bleachers at baseball games, hockey games and basketball games but, it doesn't seem to be working out like that.  It seems mommy will be on skis most of the winter and I will be wearing snowsuits, hats and gloves standing along the various ski hills around watching some of my children flip, bend and jump in the air and the others racing through flags/poles as fast as they can, sitting on the sidelines of soccer fields, and on the pool deck screaming and cheering on my children and just praying they are happy, healthy, and pleased with how they did in their competition that day.

I am excited to see how my children grow and develop and a little bit scared to see what our 4th (and youngest) is going to end up doing as she truly seems to have the daredevil gene of my husband.

Blessings to you and your beautiful people too!

-Liza

I am back and ready to speak up!!!

Hi All!

Ahhhhhhhh, finally home and back to normal!  The sun is trying to shine through the clouds and the weather is warm and the snow is on rapid-melt right now.  Spring isn't too far away!

I am feeling so happy to be home, I can't even stand it!  So, here is my topic today, actually, who am I kidding, I really have no clue until I write what my topic will really be :-) 

There are so many things running through my head right now I don't even know where to begin!!!!  I haven't blogged in over 2 weeks for any of my blogs so, I have massive overload of blogs in my head.  Which doesn't help my ADD mind very much in decision making.  BTW, thinking of going back on Ritalin just until the end of the children's school year.  I haven't taken it in about 3-4 years but, feeling it might be just the 'calm' my head needs right now.  But, for me to get on it would mean me going to the doctor monthly to get my refill and frankly, that isn't very appealing to a mom of 4 especially when that mom of 4 has ADD!!!  Hahaha.

I find myself sometimes wanting to completely 'buck the Schwab system' and just try my son on some sort of drug.  It would just be so much easier to give him a pill a day instead of trying to shove 10 a day of supplements down his throat plus, monitoring his food intake and frankly I just want him to fit in.  Even though I know that would mean turning my son into a robot, it would be nice just for one day to have the 'normal' son. 

It is really draining on me and I am sure my husband too to be constantly thinking, "I wonder what our son is doing", "I wonder when I will get a phone call" or frankly just wondering how he will act in certain situations.  I totally understand why some parents just put their children on drugs instead of working on other things!  It is not only expensive but, it is also extremely time consuming and frankly mind consuming too.  You are never at the finish line when you try and do things naturally, you are always working and re-working the routes so, you never make it to the finish line.  It is tiring at best sometimes.

But, see, that is me more worried about myself than my son...that is all I have to say to 'snap' myself out of thinking drugs could be the answer for him.  Drugs are easier for ME because I am spending so much of my time and energy on the children that I truly just don't have anymore in me to work on me too.  Maybe I should be a bit more accepting of people who choose to medicate their children instead of working on the diet, supplements and such....NAW...really?  Then I wouldn't be the Outspoken Mom anymore, haha.

I am just exhausted, I am drained and worried, it is my son's first day back after being gone for 2 weeks and I am holding my breath.  I truly strongly dislike the fact that my son can't find his place in school, in seems to be any school.  Plus, with the upcoming (or in my case, looming) self-imposed deadline of 3 weeks for our son to pull it together in school or I am pulling him to home-school, eek.  Talk about pressure.

Hence the Ritalin for mom talk and me even contemplating putting my son on something, just to keep him in school.  It breaks my heart my son isn't getting school, actually, he is getting school but, he also gets that disrupting class or acting out gets him out of class so....he chooses to get out of class as often as possible but, frankly who wouldn't?  It is so boring to just sit there everyday!  I was just like him when I was younger and I was so bored in school.  Is school supposed to be boring?  I think not!

That was the whole reason I went to college to become a teacher so that I would change the schools system or at least MY class and make sure it wasn't boring to students.  I still see the boredom seeping in when my husband and I try to help our son with his homework, it is like we both glaze over and just get sleepy.  Where is the fun in school?  Where is the excitement to learn, to grow and to explore?!

My son has a natural curiosity about nature, plants, weather and people.  He LOVES skiing, biking, building things, and water.  Why can't we find a school that teaches to his strengths, he interests, instead of just teaching to the median.  Schools now teach on the 'bell curve' no longer do they teach to interests, long gone are shop classes, art classes, baseball games during recess, cooking classes, and sewing classes.

We are a generation of parents who don't know how to sew a button on a shirt, we don't iron, we don't knit and many parents don't even know how to bake a cake anymore let alone how to cook dinner for a family anymore!  We don't plan menus, we don't know how to even read labels anymore, we purchase everything pre-packaged, pre-cooked, and pre-heated.  We don't know how to change our own oil, hang up a picture, or how to blend paints.

OH....light bulb moment here....I would say that is probably has something to do with our children and our society being so FAT!!!!  We don't know how to do anything for ourselves anymore!  We don't know how to cook, our children don't know where food comes from other than the McDonald's or Pizza Hut.  We don't have big gardens in the back yard anymore, we don't make our own sauces, stews and breads.  We purchase everything!

Then you get a child like my son who has extreme interest in cooking, growing, research, exploring, science, art, and building and he gets labeled as a trouble maker because he doesn't fit the mold of school and the robots we are raising.  Heaven forbid our children think for themselves, heaven forbid they think outside the box! 

Bring back home ec, bring back gym(real gym), bring back longer recesses, bring back art classes 2-3 times a week, and bring back shop!!!  Our children need to start thinking back outside the box and we need to embrace their differences instead of stifling them.

Feels good to be back!!!!!

-Liza

Hi all,

I haven't forgotten about my blogs, just on vacation right now, I will be back in rare writing form when I get back in a couple weeks.
Until then, please visit other blogs, and continue to read, read, read!
Until I write again

Bring on life~

Good Morning Everyone!

Ok, I just have to say that Minnesota is SO beautiful right now!  I love fresh snow!  It looks like a winter wonderland out there and makes me so happy.  I want to go skiing today but, alas no sitter for the baby.  How early is too early to introduce skiing?  haha!!  Anyway, it is beautiful out there, majestic almost.  Everything is super white, bright and clean.  My children are happy, momma is happy and well, the commuters aren't but, I don't commute so, again, I am happy.

Life is good.  Really good.

I am looking at my life right now and I truly am living the good life and this is the time of my life right now.  My children are young and funny!  My husband and I are just playing defense most of the time but, we are having fun with our children and enjoying our life.  We are surrounded by amazing friends that have become family to us now.  We are catching a glimpse of our future and what the future might bring in our children and our friends children.  It is fun to watch all the children around us growing up and developing their own neat and individual personalities, styles, and friendships. 

I find myself often being able to do some of the super fun stuff I did when I was a child because my children are now doing those things and I am discovering other fun activities I wasn't able to do as a child but, get to do now!  Just this past Friday I hung out until close at a water park and couldn't get enough of the water slides, the lazy river and the wave pool!  I had never been a big water slide person until that night and discovered my inner water slide child!!!  Let me tell you, going backwards on those tube slides is WAY more fun and exciting that going forward!  Yahoo!!! 

New for me this winter is also discovering my new love for skiing.  I had skied before but, always on rentals and really, only because I was forced to ski by people around me.  Not too much guidance and way too much fear.  This winter my hubby surprised me with my own skis and boots for our anniversary and my love for skiing was born!  I would do it every day if I could find a sitter for the baby and find myself looking forward to the upcoming winters now...what?!  Yep, actually looking forward to winters now as I love skiing and have found I have many girlfriends who like to ski and 3 of our 4 children ski...the baby...well, she is still a baby but, give her a couple years and she will probably be better and faster than me.

These are the days for sure for me.  The days when, we are still struggling to pay for all the activities, the bills, and starting to worry a bit about paying for college.  But, we are also at that point where, we are also starting to pay for things on our own, we are able to pay for things on our own, we are still taking the trips even though our parents don't pay for them anymore, we aren't having to wait for Christmas to get new clothes or things like that. 

These are the days we are most able to relive our own childhood and we are able to still plug in with our children and they like that we are around.  This is an exciting time in life, it is a time of great transitions yet, a lot of standing still. 

I welcome this time in life and I welcome all it brings.

Blessings

-Liza

Being Flexible

Good Morning Everyone!

You know what I have learned most from being a mom?  Flexibility.  I used to be rigid in my routines, my husband would actually say I still am but, I have learned to relax about things that before children would have thrown me over the edge.

Take today for example, thought I would be grocery shopping right now with my 2 older children and the baby while my 3rd was at Kindergarten.  My older two children don't have school today but, my 3rd who goes to private school did have school today.  But, instead, my 3rd was throwing up in the night and since she hit her head yesterday afternoon, my hubby took her to the ER to make sure we didn't do permanent damage to one of our children.   Turns out she is fine but, was up from 12-3am so, needless to say, she is home from school today now too.

So, it is now after 10am and I haven't done our weekly grocery shopping yet and I have nothing for dinner, do I panic?  Nope, the old Liza would have stressed out and panicked because my schedule had changed and it would paralyze me.  Instead now, we will just have a leisurely morning and THEN go grocery shopping, with all 4 children.  I will have to switch my weekly menus around a bit and make something else tonight but, that is ok.

Flexibility, I worry that my son doesn't have enough of it.  See, my guy is so much like I was when I was younger and so, I worry about him.  I don't want him to have to go through many of the things I went through as a child.  I know in my head he probably won't because he has a strong family core behind him and his 3 sisters will have his back.  But, my heart aches for the guy.   He is so rigid sometimes in his thinking, in his schedule and his routine.  But, as I grow older and have had more children, I realize that rigidness is an immature part of life.  It is mostly a part of life you go through and as you learn that life doesn't revolve around you, you learn to let go and go with the flow more.

Learning to be more flexible has also helped me out with my hubby! (and not THAT kind of flexibility although...it doesn't hurt, ha ha.)  Anyway, being more flexible has helped learn to live with another person, a big person who is a presence in any room.  He flies through life often by the seat of his pants and rules flying out the windows.  (Insert big scream here!!!!)  Oh wait, the screaming was done mostly by the more rigid Liza.  As the years fly by, and they are flying, I have learned to love my big guy more and to become more flexible with his non-routines, his very gray lines in rules and his wonderful yet sometimes, cavalier parenting style. 

I knew how I was going to parent, I knew what I was and was not going to do, I knew...oh who am I kidding!  You can think all you want you are going to parent a certain way but, holy moly, once you have children, those little people throw your world into a tailspin!  Sometimes I don't know up from down and left from right.  If you aren't able to relax, sit back and enjoy the ride they bring you on, you are going to one go nuts and two, you will drive your people nuts too.  You need to be able to go with the flow and hold on tight!

That brings me to life in the Schwab house.  Oh, it is crazy, some would call chaotic, yet, it is our life and we love it.  I would say it would be nice to have a bit more organization, a bit more cleanliness.  But, as I learned over the weekend.  Every time you clean up something, the children are drawn to that area and it is messy again before you know it.  Sigh.  We live in a messy, super small house but, our house is filled with something so many homes today aren't....LOVE and FUN.  Yes, we are typically the 'fun' parents and yes, we do pay the price sometimes as it seems we get in trouble a lot! 

I am not sure if Steve and I really should have been parents and we so, really not sure we should have been parents together!!!  Hahahaha!  But, we love our people, our children are still happy, healthy and well frankly, we haven't lost one yet to spite our best efforts sometimes.  So, the former rule follower has learned that rules don't have to be black and white, they can have some gray around them too.

So, this former super rigid, rule follower is learning to relax and the funniest part, is my hubby who used to believe EVERY rule was surrounded by many shades of gray is starting to see some black and white in them too.  I thank God every single day that I have the opportunity to be a mom but, not only a mom once but, 4 times!!!  I can't believe God trusted me enough to watch over 4 of his children!  Wow!  So, if God trusts me and Steve, maybe we should trust ourselves more in our parenting too :-)  I also thank God every single day that I get to raise my four little people with Steve.  He has turned out to be all of my dreams come true in one, complete package.  I couldn't have asked for a more perfect husband.  He gives me strength, he has taught me to laugh at myself, he has taught me to have confidence(which still I struggle with sometimes), he thinks I am beautiful and tells me in one form or another daily.  Whether by telling me flat out I am beautiful, or telling me how gross other women look(that is the BEST!!! ), or in his own special ways like, telling me he never hears what I say because all he hears is "Look at my boobs, look at my boobs" or when he tells me he wants in my pants.  Oh yes, he is ALL romance!  :-)  But, I know every single day, many times during the day that I am truly loved and desired by him, I like that.

So, today I am going to learn to be a bit more flexible, I am going to learn that some rules do have gray areas and I am going to love on my children, my husband, my friends, my God, and MYSELF~

Blessings to you all!!!!

-Liza

Get unyted!

Good Morning Everyone!

Once again I don't have much time but, I haven't written anything for a week now, which is NOT a good thing!  Sorry about that.  Life sometimes gets in the way.  There are so many things going on right now in my life and those that surround me, but, Housekeeping is NOT one of them,heehee.

Oh yes, my house has officially exploded again over the past week.  I can keep my house clean for a while but, once it starts to go, it is like trying to keep a truck from falling over a cliff with one person pulling on the rope....  Do you get my analogy?  So, once again I am living in the middle of the pit of Schwab and once again I am trapped in my own mind/body because I become paralyzed when my house gets like this.  I need an obvious starting point, I need to find point A to get to point B and if point A leads to point Q instead, forget it, my mind freaks out!

Yes, I bug me too.

But, that isn't what I was going to write about today!  No, happy, happy, joy, joy I am going to write about something I was going to say I stumbled across but, truly it stumbled across me.  There is a movement going on and it is just so great!  There is a movement that is picking up such steam and so many supporters and wow, it is fun to watch it grow and to be a small part of what is happening.

What is the movement?  It is a movement focused on uniting Gen Y females to stand up to sensationalism.  However, it is truly not just for Gen Y as I am obviously not a Gen Y person but, as a mother of a son and 3 daughters, I feel it is such an important movement I had to jump on board!  Plus, as a child who grew up believing in the sensationalism of the 80's and the excesses, the movies, the lies, I know I want to protect my children and others against those things as much as I can.

So, today I am dedicating my blog to the movement of Dave Drever and his amazing team over at TheUnYted.  I cannot say enough good things about Dave and his team of truly amazing people trying to change the world through media, music, movies, and themselves. 

If you are between the ages of 8 and 27 or if you have children between those ages, that is Gen Y!  Even if you only have boys around, I truly believe this movement can help them to understand more about treating women and understanding what a true strong woman is really about.  Plus, as I am listening to their music on the website, how can I not feel happy and joyous about this movement!

I think our mass media has destroyed our sense of security, sense of hope, sense of empowerment, sense of truly living a good life.  Not the lies that are portrayed in the media.  Come and join me and join Dave and his crew and take a stand against sensationalism! 

They are in the process of launching their new site and have a lot of exciting things happening right now!  They have many celebs on board, great musicians, actors and business leaders that have committed to take a stand. 

Please visit www.theunyted.com and www.beunyted.com

Also, Dave Drever is on Facebook and Twitter.

Come join the movement and make a real difference for our young women :-)

Blessings to you all!

-Liza

Clearing the Air.

Good Evening Everyone!

What a great Friday night!  I just got done watching some TV on my computer with my husband while our daughter's watched a movie in the basement and now, they are in bed and my house is quiet except for the gently hum of the dishwasher.

I laugh at how much the silence drives me nuts because of how much silence there was when I was growing up but, I also cherish the silence sometimes.  Again I believe it is because it must be some sort of 'safe' place or something for me.  I am sure some psychologist could break it down for me if I would ever go to one...which by the way, I probably won't :-)

I frankly like how a little off center I am.  I think it is part of what has made me a survivor during some unsavory parts of my growing up life.  Now that I am older, that off center person is a lot more centered and that is because of my stability and my "out of sight, out of mind" world I live in.  Things truly do roll down my back and into lala land most of the time.  That is why I think I am good at being so outspoken because really, I just want to get people thinking and frankly, not too much bugs me enough to stop.  I will say, there are some things that do bother me enough though where I feel I need to voice myself even more!  This is one of those times.

So, this morning I posted a blog....oh, excuse me, according to one of the comments, I should say, "entry" or "post".  So, sue me, when I wrote my BLOG for the Star Tribune this morning I knew it would be/could be a firestorm.  It was.

I don't want to give those people that commented too much press or time since most of their comments I have noticed since blogging for the Trib are based on skimming and not reading the whole article and also, because I write how I speak and so, many times if you don't know me you can fully mis-understand my meanings.  But, since many of my readers here also read my Trib blog, I thought what the hay, I can clear up some things, get them off my chest and feel good and then be over and done with it all!  See, I am what they call a barfer.  I am one of those people that needs to 'barf out' all of my issues in one big well, barf.  When something is bothering me, I 'barf' all over someone and then I feel better and I move on.  Often times, those people are left just puzzled and wondering what just happened but, I am ok and that is how I 'purge' out my feelings and frustrations.  Obviously I hope you all know I truly don't throw up on people!  But, I am a 'let it all out' person and what were considered 'freak outs' when I was younger are now more precise barfing sessions done under a more controlled environment.

This is my controlled environment!  I will do my proverbial barfing all over my own blog instead of 'freaking out' on the Star Tribune blog like I would have in my younger years.  It works for me and it is my therapy so, work with me people!

So, I wrote about stay at home moms and working moms and how I believe it is a choice to stay at home or work...unless blah, blah you are a single parent ok I get it.  Oh I feel better already!  I love my OWN blog because I can say truly whatever I want! 

Anyway, there were some comments made that truly didn't get what I was trying to say, as usual.  First of all, I had to write it more like a 'community' blog instead of a blog just about ME.  So, when I said, "You don't need the fancy car, the house, blah, blah, blah"  I really would have liked to have said, I don't need those things.  But, again what many people forget is I am writing a COMMUNITY blog trying to hit the general population.  Obviously it is not going to fit all people!  It is like the bell curve of grading.  That is my blogging, I am the bell curve of blogs.  Someone will always get an A, someone will always get an F but, most of the people will be in the middle.

What many of these people don't get either is I live in Richfield!  Hello, it isn't glamorous but, it is a good life!  I like my life.  People assume things about us living here, assume on people!  I think my husband and I frankly were led by the hand of God to move here.  We weren't looking here, we were looking in Edina at homes 1 bedroom smaller and $100,000 more expensive!  The only 2 houses we put offers on were both in Richfield!  We had no intention of living in Richfield and sort of felt in shock when we sat in the closing of our house as to how we ended up living in RICHFIELD!  Seriously.  I personally felt I was a bit 'too good' for Richfield but, we knew we were only going to be here for a year or two until we found something 'better'.  Haha, that was 8 years ago and we still have no intention of moving!

God had a plan for us and we praise him listened!  If we hadn't listened, we would have lost our home and who knows what else.  Us buying a 3 bedroom home instead of our 4 bedroom home would have been horrible because hey, we filled up our house in less than 2 years!  Also, it would have ruined us had we purchased a home $100,000 more than ours since Steve didn't have a job for almost 4 years.  God watched over us and still is.

Now, we wouldn't ever purchase a house that we needed two incomes for, wouldn't happen.  And NO, I don't feel there is a stigma of stay at home moms.  I know other stay at home moms feel that stigma but, frankly, I know more stay at home moms than I do working moms so, no stigma on my end.  Also, for me no career is worth someone else raising my children or getting the best times with my children.  NO career!  It is hard work being a stay at home mom, I miss out on a lot but, who cares?  I like having my people around me, I like that my 20 month old and I are buddies and we hang out together!  I didn't have my first child until I was 28 years old, I had 28 years of 'all about me' so, now it is time to put someone else first.

Yes, it is no secret that I feel 1 parent should stay at home with the children.  I grew up without parents around, my mom never coming to have lunch with me, no one at my games, getting rides from other parents, making my own breakfast, eating hot lunch everyday until high school when my mom finally did quit working.  I LOVED getting bagged lunches for the first time in my life!  It was great!  From that moment on(I was 16) I knew I wasn't going to work after I had children.  No way were any of my children going to miss their mom and I wasn't going to miss them either.

I take exception to the Edina snob (their own words) that assumed again, without knowing that I too didn't pay for my own college that I don't have $40,000 in school loan debt, that it is 'easier' for me to not work because I didn't have a 'career' before having children.   Yep, you are right, I didn't have a career but, even if I did, I know with all my heart I would have quit it in an instant for my children.  I knew that even as a knocked up girl with no boyfriend that I wasn't going to work 9-5 after having my child because I wanted to raise that baby.  So, I quit my full time job with terrific and FREE health/dental benefits but, no flexibility, and starting selling Tupperware so I could insure I could be at home with my child and work nights while the baby slept and make my own hours and dictate how little or much money I made. 

There ARE choices, there are always choices.  I stand by my saying before, I choose my children.  Some women don't they choose there careers.  I am NOT ripping on working moms, I just want you all to admit that yes, you are choosing your career.  That is all.  I also stand by what I said before, you can't have it all, something will suffer and unfortunately it is usually the children. 

Someday I might have to work, I know that but, hopefully it won't be until my son heads off to college and the girls are in jr high and high school.  See, that is another thing I have vowed to do and I will do everything in my power to make happen.  I know how horrible it is to have the burden of student loans, especially since I don't even work!  Steve and I know that we plan on paying for our children's college no matter what the cost.  We don't want our children taking out huge loans and we don't want them having to work their way through college either.  We have 4 children we plan on putting through college and some how, we will find a way to pay for it too.  Even if it means Steve and I each working 2 jobs, we will find a way.

So, there is my barf.  Now go take a shower and I will go on my merry way feeling so much better :-)

Thanks for sticking with me even through my rants and raves!

Blessings to you all,

-Liza

Pants on the Ground

Good Morning Everyone!

I have been wanting to write about this for a really long time and now I finally think it is a good time to get the word out there and to bring attention to it.  Sagging pants!

Sagging pants first of all looks ridiculous and I am sorry but, nothing about that looks cool.  Yes, I know I am old but, nothing looks cool people!  First of all, you can't walk right wearing them like that, your underwear is showing and frankly, I am grossed out and appalled by it.  I think you rich, suburban white boys look even more ridiculous doing it!  I sincerely hope during the Olympics the coaches will make the snowboarders pull up their pants too.

Maybe to get these kids to realize how ridiculous they all look us parents should pick a day and all wear our pants saggy.  Nothing makes something more uncool faster than when parents start to do it :-)

Anyway, I will tell you another reason why it is horrible and obnoxious to do it and why I feel in the black culture it is really sad that it is being done and wonder why the elders don't step up and say something.  Actually, one did stand up and say something on American Idol last week.  He sang his song, "Pants on the Ground" and it became a hit all over the viral web.  Even my own beloved Brett Favre and the Minnesota Vikings sang it in the locker room Sunday after their big win over the Cowboys.

But, where did this come from?  Well, there are two stories and either one I would think would be a deterrent to wearing sagging pants.  First one isn't horrible but, comes from the jails where inmates were given clothes that were too big and they weren't allowed belts so, their pants kept falling down.  Hmmm, that is nice boys,(and some girls) emulating a prisoner....pathetic!

Second though is even more tragic and sick and sad.  I had heard this story many years ago from my husband who has a friend that did research on it.  Years ago when there were still slaves, their white masters would rape the men and then make them wear their pants saggy so they could pick them out easier for the next time they wanted to rape them.  It was their 'mark'.  Sick.  So, that is what our youth culture is wanting to emulate?  What happened to pride?  Why don't our schools combat this sagging pants issue by making THAT story more talked about or how about making these kids research the origins so they can see how foolish and ridiculous they are for doing this.

As a black man(or woman) you should feel more pride in yourself and your family and not wear your saggy pants that are a sign of sadder people(jailed ones) and sadder times of slavery.  As a white man, you should be sick of what some of your ancestors did and stand up and don't repeat history!  History is repeated when history is forgotten. 

Stand up and fight this stupid pants dropping/low slung fashion statement and take the time to educate yourself and others.

Blessings to you all,

-Liza

Bring Back Dodge-ball!!!!

Good Morning Everyone!

Today I come to you desperate and well frankly disappointed and discouraged and I would like to change all of that.

I am way too many words that are negative about our schools.  I am not upset about the usual things we hear people talking about I am upset about things that I think people feel but, are either too timid to mention anything or are just maybe oblivious.

What am I talking about?  I am talking about our schools turning our children into mono-thinking, boring little robots.  Have you noticed this?  In Richfield Public Schools our children must sit only with their class, you are not allowed to talk during lunch time and you only get one recess a day, even for the primary grades. 

Our schools are expecting our children to sit for long periods of time, to think only a certain way, we only give creative classes like Art and Music once a week(however in my son's school Art is once every other week!) and Phys Ed is all over the place.  For a while it was only once a week, now because everyone is so afraid of having fat children, they are doing it 2-3 times a week or more.  Which is great but, we have carpeted gymnasiums now, we don't play games like Bombardment or Dodge-ball, and heaven forbid the children get to choose their own teams!  No way!  Now they do lessons about Yoga, how to play 'fair' and Ships Across the Ocean. 

Our children sit for so long it is actually unhealthy!  They are punished for being squirmy or worse yet, labeled as being ADD/ADHD.   Long gone are the childhood games of tag, fort building, or snowball throwing and forget about the occasional food fight!  That is cause for expulsion now!  Our educators have become rigid and strict.  They are creating a 'fair' world which can't possibly exist in the real world and we are ill-preparing our children for the future. 

We are teaching our children that you can make excuses for your bad behavior by putting a label on it or better yet, taking a pill for it.  Our schools are forcing homework younger and younger and more and more of it.  Children can no longer socialize outside of their own classroom.  They have to be quiet in the halls, quiet in the lunchroom and in some cases there is even NO running on the playground!

Why are we as parents letting this happen to our children?  Why are we not fighting for our children and their childhood?!!  We all went through the hair pulling, teasing, occasional fights on the playground heck, we even did penny drops over cement for goodness sake.  Most of us survived.  Yes, there was that occasional mishap of a broken arm or black eye but, wasn't that a part of childhood?

I know we don't want our children to be teased, we don't want them to get hurt and we want to protect them all the time.  But, in doing that we are really hurting them!  They need to know that behaviors have consequences and not because the teacher or the parent told them so!  They need to know there is a pecking order on the playground, they need to understand it is ok once in a while to disagree and frankly that it is ok if you don't get along with someone that is life.

My grassroots movement is for bringing back some of the 'childhood' into schools.  I want more recess time in our schools, especially for the younger grades.  The children need more 'free learning' time for exploring and adventure.  I want them to be able to sit with their friends, talk about life and their fun adventures and their dreams of what they are going to be when they grow up.  And yes, sorry schools but, I think if they drop something on the floor or sneak and switch lunches that is ok.  Yep, you heard that from a mom who has children with food allergies even! 

If my child wants to trade their banana for an apple, go for it!  Or if their friends want to trade their pb&j for a ham sandwich, good!  It is called bargaining and it is a good life skill to have.  I remember selling friendship bracelets, friendship pins and other 'handmade' goods at school in the hallway!  That was how I bought my candy after school to eat on the way home.  Oh yea, I even walked to school when I was little, GASP!

It is up to us parents to start demanding our schools change.  My children are bucking the system here and there and Steve and I are happy about that.  We don't want those little children that sit with their hands in their laps and just listen and obey.  We like that we see a little 'fight' in our children!  We like that they question rules sometimes and we like that they are outspoken(imagine US having outspoken children) and ask why there are such rules and why they can't talk and such. 

Steve and I have already begun to verbally communicate with our Principals, teachers and Aides how we feel about their many restrictions and we will continue to do that.  We have also been talking with other parents and getting them involved.  Our next move will be going to the School boards and the community.  Our children need to be children, it is ok to be a bit squirmy, don't you remember the phrase, "Ants in your pants"? 

Let's bring back the morning recess and the after lunch one.  Let's extend those recess times to more than 15-20 minutes!  Let's bring back allowing the children to talk in the lunchroom, in the hallways(obviously quiet talk) and BRING BACK DODGE-BALL!  Bring back Red Rover, sledding at recess, snowball fights, and all those other things I am forgetting about that were super fun and just a part of being a child.

I don't think children are learning anymore now than they did when we were growing up!  Yes, they are learning about more 'stuff' but, they aren't learning the basics anymore.  And the life lessons they are learning they are being told in the classroom instead of being able to experience it in the halls, lunchroom, gymnasium, and playground.

I have one theory as to when all this stuff starting changing and yep, it is controversial but, here goes....I think much of the 'fun stuff' and 'normal childhood' stuff started leaving the schools when open enrollment went into effect.  Just one of those crazy ways us 'white/middle-class/burb living' parents decided to 'protect' our children from those 'non-white/rough/city' kids.  Am I right, no clue!  But, just got you to think didn't I?

Blessings to you all and fight for your children!  Fight for their dreams and stop letting our schools stifle their imaginations!

-Liza