The Outspoken Mom Blog

moving up in the world

Hi all!

I just wanted to let you all know, I am in the process of building my blog into a true blogging site with hopefully many different aspects to it.  I am working on getting my blog to be more things to more people and hopefully to really turn this into something that people not only read for entertainment or because they like me but, to also turn to for help and to truly become a part of my blog and to create a true blogging community. 

If I can figure it all out...the new community will consist of local and small business owners/advertisers, most of which are other moms!  It will also consist of guest bloggers writing about their lives and blog posts related to and in connection with my own postings.  I am also hoping to get some sort of forum going too.

So, as I work on redesigning my current blog, my posts might not be as frequent or as long but, if I can get this all done, the outspoken mom will be more things to more people and I am excited to see where it will go from here.

I do have to tell you all, this seems to be where God is leading me as many doors are opening for me and my blog right now that I never could have imagined.  He has been putting amazing people into my life lately and frankly, I thought I already had some pretty awesome people in my life already!  But, lately he is showing me and leading me to people from all over the place and from all walks of life and I feel truly blessed to be in a 'community' with them all.

So, I hope you all continue to walk with me and to stay with me through this growing process and stay tuned.......

-Liza

Fun Dad,

Hey first of all this is not Liza it’s her dashing husband......I thought that you readers might get a little insight in to my wonderful wife and what she has to deal with on a day to day basis......so let’s get right to it...first of all I’m not a writer and so I use poor grammar and spelling...and I don’t care...so no emails about that.
So I get home from work last night and there are 6 kids running around our little house….its Winter in Minnesota so they are inside…but to get inside you have to step over 6 pairs of boots, coats and snow pants……Liza is cooking a chicken and so we are waiting for dinner…..I do my usual and say hi to everybody and plop down on the couch in the kitchen…..and greet all the kids like Santa….I just sit and they all come through….after sitting there for a while my wife offers me a cocktail. I said sure bring on….we have some vodka left in a bottle and so she pours is all into a glass and hands it to me…my greeting were done and she was cooking so I just keep sitting there drinking my drink…pretty good life I have. She makes herself a drink and then we eat dinner….just to give you a little color the kids all know that I have “daddy’s Juice”…..I have maybe one drink every three weeks at home…so for all of you teetotalers’ back off……I don’t have a problem….well I have tons of problems but drinking just isn’t one of them.
So after dinner the kids want to go skating at the park and I said sure…lets go…the three big ones get dressed and we head off to the park 2 blocks from our house…I drive because of budget cutbacks the warming house is not open and so the kids put their skates on in the car….the ice is down but they are not turning on the lights……More budget cutbacks so I park my car on the rink to shine my headlights on the rink so the kids can see…after about 30 minutes my son asks if I can drag the kids with the car around the rink…and being “fun dad” I say sure and all three of the kids grab the back of my car and I drag them around the rink!....boy are we having fun…I’m driving on the ice and the kids are getting dragged it’s “fun dad” at its best!
After about 20 minutes of doing this I park my car back on the ice to let the kids skate some more….right when I park the car I see a cop car pull out from behind the tree……oops…apparently you can’t drive your car on the ice and the frown on dragging your 3 kids behind a 3000 pound car that you have no control over on the ice…..who knew? So me and my 3 kids get lectured about how dangerous and stupid it is to do what we were doing and how only by the grace of god we are all not dead or at least missing most of our body parts. After the lecture the cop puts his car in reverse and starts to pull out and asks on last question…..have you been drinking?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Before I could even start to answer my 3 kids all said “oh yeah, dads been drinking….he likes to drink…he had one right before he came here”!...it was almost like a contest among the 3 to tell the cop faster and louder…oh yeah he’s been drinking! I said nothing and the cop put his car in park.
Next think I know another of Richfield’s finest is at the park and guess what? Daddy gets to do sobriety tests…I stand on my foot count to twenty and do the look into the light and follow the finger…and followed up with the 9 step heal toe back and forth. The great part about it is that the cops do nothing to get my kids away so they are talking and Seth is telling them that I’m going to jail and Lorelei is saying I’m going to get a ticket and Charlie is wondering why I don’t have a computer in the car like the police guy…other than being scared shitless and talking to my kids and the cops and doing roadside tests…I’m good.
So I’m done with those tests and he pops the trunk….I was hoping he was going to give me a medal for father of the year…he didn’t pull out the medal but a breathalyzer instead. I tell my kids to go skate and ask the cop if I’m found drunk would he please call my wife and come get the kids before he cuffs and stuffs me. He says maybe…I say thanks….so I blow!!!!!!!!
.031 daddy could have had another drink!
Just kidding…I have never been more scared in my life…not only is a DUI bad…I can’t do my job with a DUI…a lot was at stake….my own Christmas miracle.
So the cops gave me a verbal beat down saying that driving on the ice with your three kids behind the car while you have been drinking is apparently not what they would like to see. I stood there dumbfounded not understanding what the issue was. I’m fun dad…we have superpowers…not judgment!
I have not seen my wife laugh as hard as she did last night when I told her…good living…blessings to you all.
Steve

A guest Blogger

Good Afternoon everyone,

Today I have a guest blogger!  My 5 year old daughter has asked if she could write my blog today so, I said, "of course you can!".  I will be dictating what she says as she still can't read which means, she can't type either.

I have absolutely NO idea what this will be about so, here goes....

Lorelei's Blog:

Lorelei was standing on the top.  A boy or girl was crying because they got the flu mist. At the doctor.

(writing about school)..I do crafts there, we are learning about China and I am learning to speak Chinese.  I made a China firework and I was born in the year of the sheep.   1 is 'e' in Chinese and to say 'hi' in Chinese you say, "nee-how".  I want to go to China some day and see the Great Wall...the Great Wall is really long.  I am learning how to do chopsticks too.  My mom is teaching me but, I don't like Sushi.  Yuck.

I am allergic to wheat but, I love it when daddy sneaks me Pop Tarts.

(about what she wants to be when she grows up)...I want to be a baby person.  I want to take care of babies in the hospital.  I want to be a doctor that takes care of babies in the hospital. 

I want to be on the swim team too.  I want to be in the Olympics for swimming.  I swam in a marathon at the Y and I swam 600 yards.  It was fun.  I got a swim bag and swim cap for doing it.  I want to swim on the swim team.

This spring, I am going to be in a gymnastics meet.  I need to practice my cartwheels and handstands to move up to advanced. (from beginner to advanced in Gymnastics)

Seth has a trophy from Cub Scouts because he builded a boat and it was the best one.  So, he won a trophy with clay in it.

-Lorelei

Ok, it is me Liza again, wow, that was wow.  For those of you who don't have children, I am sorry for this super random, going no where blog!  What I have learned in being a parent is it is NOT about you.  It is all about them.  Which, I am completely ok with.  I love everything about being a parent.  Children are the funniest people you will ever meet if you actually sit down and talk to them or just listen to their conversations with each other.

I do have to tell you all the funniest thing I have heard in a long time, my husband heard it too and we both laughed and laughed!

Last night our 6 and 7 year old were heading to church choir and our 5 year old was heading to dance class.  On the way out, our 6 year old noticed something 'weird' on top of a table in our entry.  (She was looking at a ladies feminine hygiene product that had slipped out of its wrapper in my coat pocket...I did that as walking out the door earlier in the day...forgot it was still sitting there.)  So, our daughter picks this thing up, sees the different parts of it and is examining it.  Before I can tell her to put it down or what it is my son blurts out, "CHARLIE, put that down!  That's for mom's butt.  B-U-double T spells Butt."  (yes, he did the spelling just like that!)

My husband laughed so hard and of course had to add his own commentary to that by saying, "yea, for mom's leaky butt."  So, they all left the house last night laughing about how mom has a leaky butt and all that great stuff.

So, as parents, again I will say, if you can't laugh at yourself, your life is going to be pretty miserable because your children and husband will definitely be laughing at you!

I will say though, the best way to find out how your children are doing at reading and writing isn't from making them read to you or seeing how well they did on their spelling tests that week.  The best way is to see how much of your adult conversations they pick up on by you spelling everything and them catching you or them finding notes or products or something around the house that they shouldn't have found and reading them and coming up to you and asking you questions about it.  Oh yea, that is when you know, you child can read and spell!

Take care everyone, remember to cover your friends in prayer and be grateful for your loved ones.

-Liza