The Outspoken Mom Blog

Thanksgiving and just plain, Thanks.

Good Morning Everyone!

As I sit at my computer this morning listening to my baby scream at me, because I won't hold her 24 hours a day without a break, I am reflecting on things I am thankful for in my life.  So, in honor of tomorrow being Thanksgiving I thought I would write a thankful blog!

I have so much to be thankful for in my life it is hard to know where to even begin.  First of all, I am thankful that I have my faith in God to guide me through this life.  It isn't always easy to live in this world but, with God's guidance and constant love I feel like everything will always be OK even if it doesn't seem like it at the time.

I am thankful for all of my childhood dreams coming true, even if they weren't exactly how I pictured it, they really did all come true.  I am thankful for my crazy, messy, teeny home filled with 4 beautiful children and a husband who truly was created just for me.  I am thankful for all of my parents and I have a lot of them!  I am thankful for my mother who did the best she could under our circumstances, I am thankful for my father who never really grew up but, at the same time hasn't grown old because of it and I love that about him! 

Let me tell you all, something, I am thankful for all I have no matter what!  I would much rather have my baby pulling at my leg and crying than not have her.  I would much rather have a mother that I don't really see eye to eye with than not have a mother at all.  I know many people that are going through some rather difficult things right now and I pray that in writing a blog like this, everyone can find something to be thankful for in their lives.  No matter how difficult life seems to be right now, or how sad or how wrong everything seems to be, there is always something to be thankful for. 

I have always been a very positive person.  Yes, in reading some of my blogs you might not always see that positivity but, if you knew me in person, you would see a lot of it.  Remember my blogs are just a window into my life, they are not my entire life.  Life is good, it is hard but, it is good.  Unfortunately with the good comes the bad and sometimes life seems overly unfair and difficult but, I know from my experiences it always gets better somehow, someway. 

Looking back at my life, at all of those boyfriends I cried over because I thought my life would end because they weren't 'the one'.  Thank GOD those relationships ended!  Otherwise, I wouldn't have my husband, my 4 children, my cat, my dog, my home, my LIFE!  I am thankful for those relationships and everything I went through with them, they helped form who I am now and I learned how to deal with certain things.  I am thankful for my husband losing his job not once but, twice and then three times in 4 years.  Yes, I am very thankful for that time in our lives.  Not only did it help us to grow as a couple and a family but, it also led us to people that we would have never met.  It led us to grow in our faith, it taught us how to lean on friends and on God.  It also showed us what it is truly like to be on the verge of losing everything you own.  I am so thankful for that time in my life.  It has taught me that people with less than myself deserve the same things as I do if not more!  I got over myself and my thinking that people should just be thankful they are getting food when I gave food to the food shelves.  No longer, now I give them what I would want and what I wanted when my family had to 'shop' at the food shelf each month.

I am thankful for good friends that have stood by my family and I through our ups and downs.  I am thankful for friends that we have stood by and continue to stand by through their ups and downs.    Life is so much more than things.  Life is so much more than stuff.  Life is so much more than money.  I have seen too many people gain and then lose it all, I have seen so many people lose so much yet, they continue to live, they continue to grow and they hopefully continue to learn from past mistakes.

Life is a hard thing to do sometimes but, there is always something to be thankful for if you really look around.  Life is full of lessons to learn and grow from.  You can hold on to the past and live a life of regret.  You can hold on to the future of someday and miss the present.  I am learning to live in the now.  I am learning that right now is what matters and right now is where I need to focus.  Yes, you need to look at your past and be thankful for the lessons learned and be thankful for the memories.  Yes, you need to look to your future and be thankful for what you might be like then.  Yes, you need to plan for the future however, you also need to live for today and be thankful for each day you have. 

Use your head, use your heart, and most importantly, lean on your friends and your God for guidance.  I am thankful everyday for so much including you!  I am thankful I have a voice that can reach out to others and to hopefully touch people.

Thank you all for walking through a small window of my life with me and to those dear friends of mine who read this blog, thank you so much for walking through a rather large door of my life with me.  Thank you to my husband for walking through the largest cave of my life with me and not only still staying with me but, loving me even more to spite myself.  Thank you to my children for loving me even when you 'hate' me and for giving me the greatest joy I have ever experienced in life.  I pray that I won't mess you all up too bad and that your therapy bills won't be too high when you are adults :-)
Thank you to my parents for rushing into marriage and having me.  Even though things didn't work out for your marriage, you taught me so much about what kind of a mom, wife, friend I want to be. Thank you to my step-father who has always treated me like his own daughter and who often played 2nd fiddle to my 'real' dad for much of the fun but, stood by me through the icky stuff.
Thank you to my extended family of step-people, Aunts, Uncles, a Grandfather, cousins, 'brother', mother in law, sisters and other in-laws and who ever else is part of my rather LARGE extended family!  All of you have guided me and watched over me in some special way and all of you have helped me to be who I am.  Many of you are still walking with me in life on a regular basis and I am so thankful to you all for being here.  Not just because you are family and you have to but, because you want to. 

Thank you dearly to my friends.  My current group of friends is the closest and most loving group of friends I have had in my life.  Some have been friends for a long time, most are newer friends that have only in recent years become a part of my 'family'.  I have friends that I can truly lean on, rely on, and trust.  My friends not only love me but, they love my husband and my children and it is fun to walk through life with these people!

Lastly and most importantly, thank you to God!  Lord, I would have nothing without you.  Thank you for constantly pursuing me and relentlessly pursuing me!  Thank you for loving me when I probably didn't deserve it and holding me when I needed it.  Thank you for never letting me go and thank you for guiding me even when I fought you every step of the way.  Thank you for allowing me your forgiveness over and over and over again!  Thank you for hitting me over the head with your 'love' mallet and for FINALLY letting me see, feel, and trust your love!  October 15, 2000 truly was the best day of my life and I am thankful that I now am able to live a life devoted to you.

This Thanksgiving what are you all thankful for?  No matter what is going on in your life right now, stop, sit down, and think about all the things you are thankful for.  Be sure to thank someone today, you never know if that will become their thankful part of the day.  God is good all the time and all the time, God is good!

Blessings to you all this Thanksgiving Holiday!

-Liza

No robots allowed..update

Good Evening Everyone!

My baby is in bed and my husband took the other 3 to a water-park!  Oh, I feel like I can breathe!!!  I just have to clean up the kitchen before they get home but, I will take that any day to trying to entertain tired and fussy children at night.

So, today was school conference day at 2 of my children's schools and as always, just terrific news. hahahahahaha.  Just once, I would like to go to a school conference and not hear about how my children don't listen, they don't sit still and they don't follow the rules.  Hey, I get it OK?!  My children aren't rule followers, I don't really like it but, at the same time, I don't feel like they should be expected to sit all day long in a chair and just look up and listen.  I don't want that child!  I like that my children have fire in their belly's.  Oh granted, it would be nice if my children listened ONCE IN A WHILE and if they didn't choose to use mommy's bad words in class, and well, I guess it would be nice if I didn't have the child that throws stuff at the teacher when they get a problem wrong...OK!  So my children aren't the greatest in the classroom, lol. 

But, I don't think they are absolutely horrible either.  OK, well my son is pretty horrible sometimes and he is difficult...OH fine....my children SUCK in school. lol. 
Oh, where was I going with this?  OHHHHH!

So, my children aren't the easiest and I don't really know what would help them sometimes but, I do believe a lot of what our schools and school systems are trying to do is force our children into becoming robots.  We want and expect them to sit and be quiet, to not talk in the lunch room and if they throw food, they can't eat in the lunchroom anymore!  What ever happened to food fights?  I LOVED those!  Or what happened to sitting with your friends and yes, many times I sat alone but, oh those times I got to sit with a big group of people, that was awesome!  I remember school being fun.  I remember spending tons of time out on the playground and in the parking lot with NO playground ladies telling us we couldn't run.  We had 3 recesses a day at my elementary school.  One in the morning when we first got to school.  See, our buses didn't drop us off right before the bell rang, we got dropped off about 20 minutes before school started and played up until they told us to line up.  Oh, and we all ran as fast as we could to get our backpacks in line first when we got dropped off. 

Things were pretty fair, if you ran slow, you were always last...I liked that, I believe it made me the fast runner I am today.  We played games in the parking lot, did penny drops over the TAR parking lot, we stuck our tongues to cold metal poles and lived.  It was crazy scary!  Oh and get this, I even had to WALK to school across busy roads and a freeway!  What?!  Oh yes, I walked to school every year 6 blocks and nothing happened to me, no crazy person stole me or my friends, we played games all the way to and from school.  I was home alone starting in 2nd grade and made myself breakfast and dinner.  I woke up to the timer on the stove and never was late to school.

I don't remember having to sit inside on snowy or rainy days for recess either...we went outside rain or shine, I think that was the teachers break time!  Every girl knew how to do a cartwheel, back-bend, and how to hang upside down on the bars by 1st grade and everyone jumped rope for hours.  You were considered weird if you couldn't do a cartwheel by 1st grade.  We flipped, jumped, scampered, flipped some more, and hung upside down for what seemed to be hours every day. 

We didn't have to 'train' for our Presidential Physical Fitness awards because we did most of those things daily anyway.  I remember in gym class we played Red Rover Red Rover and tried our hardest to break through that line no matter how much we hurt the other person, it was GREAT!  Then there was dodge-ball, bombardment (how do you spell or say that?!), ships across the ocean, OH and we picked teams!  Yeah, that's right, 2 people were picked and we picked teams based on skill and yes, the weakest person was always picked last, get over it, none of us cared, it was life and we knew it.

We listened to our teachers, we followed the rules and wow, when an adult spoke, we listened!  We knew they were big and scary and weren't to be messed with.  Our parents and their friends and ALL adults were NOT our friends and we were OK with that, in fact, we preferred it that way. 

Our playgrounds were simple and metal....not plastic which, isn't plastic bad for the environment?  Yes, our playgrounds were 'Earth friendly' before we even knew what that was.  They were metal, not painted, not pretty, they were a bland gray but, they worked.  We had monkey bars, hanging bars, lines and lines of swings on super long chains that could help us to reach the sky!  We had merry go rounds, domes to climb, and super tall metal slides that burned your butt in the summer and made you go about 50 miles an hour in the winter in your snow pants.  I remember always packing snow onto the slides so you would go faster.  Everything was about speed, danger, and I never remember feeling afraid.  I wasn't, didn't know you could get hurt and if you did get hurt, oh well, you got a band-aid and got right back up to do it all over again.
I wasn't a dare devil by any means.  I was actually considered a scaredy cat by those older standards.  I didn't dare do a penny drop until 5th grade for goodness sake! 

 I remember by 6th grade I was playing basketball for the entire recess and get this...WITH my 6th grade teacher the whole time!  Yea, that is right, my teacher would eat lunch with us and then go out and play some b-ball with us on the playground!  How many of your children's teachers do that now a days?!!  I remember in junior high being teased profusely about my nasty red hair and gaingly legs.  I was often compared to a flamingo on the soccer field and hey oh well.  Yes, I have horrible memories of junior high but, really looking back, I had a lot of fun then too.  I was ugly back then!  Heck it was the 80's there weren't too many good looking people back there and by the way...for all of you trying to bring back 80's fashion...dig out the old jr high photos, you will put that flashdance sweatshirt and leggings with a super mini lace skirt back right away!

People often tell me I probably looked like Molly Ringwald with my short red hair, I laugh hardily and let them know that I looked like the OTHER red head from Sixteen Candles...yes, that is right, Anthony Michael Hall...yep, proud of being so stinking ugly!  Man, my scanner isn't hooked up...I need to find a photo to post for you all, it truly is a sight to see.  Ok, I am back couldn't find the truly horrible ones but, found one that will show you just a piece of the heinous puzzle of junior high

Yes, that is me on the right!  Oh and the person to my left that is actually a girl too..see, the 80's horrible!!!!

OK back to my rants and raves.  Point is, I am going to include an email my girlfriend sent to me to put this all into perspective...relax!!!!  We all survived so we might have broken a few arms (I never did) or a leg or two (again, not me) and so what if we have scars, that is what happens when you LIVE life!!  Let your children LIVE life, don't just let them be molded into something that is 'easy' or 'manageable'.  Don't teach your children to just exist..life is way to short for that.

Encourage your children to think for themselves, to problem solve and to think outside of the box.

Here is the email.....

 First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-base paints. (again...sorry, no belly's please!)

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, locks on doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had baseball caps not helmets on our heads.

As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, no booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes. (I don't condone this one as I was ALWAYS in a car seat)

Riding in the back of a pick- up truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.  (Everyday in the summer!, still do!)

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and no one actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread, real butter and bacon. We drank Kool-Aid made with real white sugar. And, we weren't overweight. WHY?

Because we were always outside playing...that's why!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day. And, we were O.K. 

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride them down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times,we learned to solve the problem.

 

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's and X-boxes. There were no video games, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet and no chat rooms. 
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them! 

 

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

 

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever. 

(I TOTALLY did the eating worms thing!  In fact, we made worm cookies for a badge in Girl Scouts!!!)
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them. 

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment.

Imagine that!! 

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! 

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever.

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas..

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all. 

If YOU are one of them? CONGRATULATIONS! 

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good.

While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave and lucky their parents were.

Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it ? (YES!)

 

So everyone!  Go out and make a mud pie, cook up some worm cookies, eat some grass, run through the sprinklers and for goodness sake, hang upside down once in a while!!!!

Blessings to you all!

-Liza

Oh By The Way, I too wash my children's mouths out with soap occassionally if bad things come out of that mouth.  We have a bar of Ivory soap sitting in the hall closet for just that occassion.  Trust me, after even one time, they see that bar coming and they quickly change their potty mouth tune.  So, throw me in jail or throw the book at me in court but, I am trying my hardest to raise children that will respect adults and some day be hard-working, upstanding, well educated, adults that will contribute something to society other than a pain in the neck.

What am I talking about?  Here is the link :

http://www.nbcmiami.com/news/local-beat/Mom-Arrested-for-Washing-Kids-Mouth-With-Soap--64112132.html

Girl Time

Good Morning Everyone!

Ok, enough with the political blogs!  Too serious for me plus, frankly really boring.  I have no clue where today's blog is heading or what it will be about but, I am sure I will find something to write about, otherwise, I will just sit here and type stuff to you all.

So, I am getting ready for my first time away from my family.  I am really excited to have a girls weekend up at the cabin!  Sad to say but, I have only been on ONE other girls weekend anything and that was when I was dating Steve!!!  So, this is only my 2nd girls weekend in my life and my first time ever leaving my husband or children behind.

I have discovered that in my years of being thrifty and/or broke, I have always put off travel and 'girl' time for work, family, and when in my 20's, boyfriends.  So dumb!   Here I am 37 years old and I am just starting my weekends away with girlfriends.  Well, I guess the old saying fits here, better late than never.

One of my girl friends seems to travel a lot with her various girl friends, she even has a group of girl friends from high school that she sees every year!  Yes, every year they travel somewhere and meet up as a group and just hang out and do whatever girls do on weekends.  Is it really bad that I really don't know?  My husband keeps being gross and asking if we are going to have pillow fights in our underwear and various other gross statements.  Love you babe :-)

I guess I always in-visioned girls weekends as spa trips, going to a spa and being pampered and just eating, drinking, and going out on the town with soft skin, new make-up and your hair and nails professionally done.  I think that is what the 'rich' ladies do, lol.  Someday I plan on doing a trip like that but, for now, that truly isn't really me.  Granted, I would have a lot of fun but, not willing to fork over that much money for a weekend away from the family.

This coming weekend is perfect for my first time away.  It is up at the family cabin(free), only a 2 hour drive(close), and NOT on a plane (praise the LORD).  Plus, I am going with my close knit group of friends that I tend to do a lot with and so, it won't be awkward, or weird.  We will all be able to relax, hopefully giggle a lot, and just truly enjoy each other's company and the weather looks perfect too!

Oh, where was I?  Sorry, forgot tonight was slow cooker night due to all of our family activities tonight so, I had to quick get up and peel the carrots and defrost the chicken!  My hands are orange from peeling all the carrots.

Back to the girls weekend!  I really am in shock of how fast the 10 years have gone since my first and last girls weekend and truly, I am the person that always says, "I can do that later, or tomorrow."  I put off things and before you know it, I haven't done anything and 10+ years have gone by.  Yes, I know I was very busy having babies and my husband didn't have a job for a while but, still, I really did put off getting away from the children.

Honestly, it is because there isn't anyone to watch our children and I really wanted my first time (away) to be with my husband.  But, neither one of our parents is willing to take all of our children and our friends all have children the same ages so, they are doing the same things we are!  I now feel like our lives are finally going at a pace where we can get away, or at least I can.  The older ones can actually help out a bit around the house and with the baby, whether they will or not is a whole other issue.  We also have a nanny in our lives that we have known since before Libby was born so, she knows our children and our family and we trust her completely to be able to be with our children for a weekend.

I hope this weekend is just the beginning of time away not only for me but, for Steve and I.  We have never taken a honeymoon and have only been on 2 trips together without children(both of which were when we were dating).  So, it is our time to start concentrating more on us instead of just the children.  I think it is very important for the children to see us focused on our marriage which frankly, we haven't been lately.

Oh bummer, I need to cut this short, the baby is about to wake up, I need to change laundry, clean the house, and still need to try and get in a shower today! 

I will try and write another blog before I leave for the weekend but, if I don't, look for an update on my first time away on Monday!

Blessings to you all and pray for my family and I!

-Liza

Hectic Schedules

Good Morning Everyone!

I can't believe I am taking the time to write this blog but, I do love writing so yes, I am taking the time!

I never knew how busy I would be as a stay at home mom, truly busy.  Back to school is usually the hardest part because everything starts at the same time.  So, I am not only making sure my children all have their backpack, lunch box, and school supplies but, I am also writing insane amount of checks, blowing through even more cash than at Christmas or vacation and I still am forgetting some things.  I think I am going to keep our baby out of any activity until her older brother can drive to help out!  That is only 7 1/2 more years so, she can do her first activity of any kind when she is 9.  Yeah right!

I just laugh looking at our family calendar and how some of the days are so full I have run out of space to right!  Even my Outlook Calendar can't take it all in!  I think it thinks there is some error with how busy some of the days are. 
I admit, I completely overbook myself and my children on a couple days a week but, that is because we try to book most if not all of their activities in the middle of the week so that Mondays, Fridays and weekends we have very little scheduled.  I know that will have to change as they get older but, for now, we barely see each other Tuesdays and Wednesdays.

Our schedule is actually manageable with the amount of activities they have but, then you add in birthday parties, birthdays, my book club, our dinner club, date night, doctor/dentist appointments, and Bible study and WOW things get really hectic fast.  Our craziest time of year is usually September and October too which I would love to be the least hectic with school and everything getting going again but, in Minnesota you can only play summer soccer or fall soccer and for the little ones, fall soccer ends 2nd week of October due to cold temps.

Yes, many of our schedules are forced by our seasons here in Minnesota and others are forced by working parents and other over scheduled families.  So, I guess we all do it to ourselves.  Really, how much is too much?  See I had no siblings so, I did a lot of activities because there also weren't children in my neighborhood to play with and my mom worked a lot.  So, I did dance, gymnastics, softball, soccer, and basketball.  Granted, I didn't do any sports until 4th grade which is when most of the children started sports...not like now when if you don't have your child proficient in a sport by age 5 forget it! 

So, my 8 year old is playing soccer right now but, only 1 or 2 days a week and next week he starts church choir(which he hates, I will admit).  He will start Cub Scouts again next month and we are forcing him to play hockey again this year.
My 6 year old(will be 7 on Sunday) is doing dance, gymnastics, and ice skating(only in winter) and thinks she will be playing basketball again this year(so painful to watch!  She just sits on the floor unless she is bringing the ball down) and Daisy's(baby girl scouts) will start up again for her in October and church choir will start for her again next week too.  Plus, she wants to play softball next spring..add to that her social calendar of birthday parties(which she LOVES as friends are her life) and that she makes us sign her up for after school care because to her it is social hour :-)  I do truly love that girl!
Then, my 5 year old who is finally a big girl in Kindergarten, she is our most active and gets most joy from sports and activities along with friends.  She is in dance, gymnastics, soccer, ice skating(in winter only), and new this year swim team(2-3 days a week).  She also wants us to sign her up for tennis and hockey..we are waiting a bit. 

I only have so many hours in a day/week but, I am also flat broke some months by all the activities fees!  This month of September has been so expensive I blew through my entire months grocery budget(on activity fees) in less than 2 weeks.  Sorry family, it is beans and rice for the next 2 weeks!  Just kidding honey, I know you read my blog daily.

It does crack me up though.  Because after adding in the meetings about all the sports and activities, the volunteer hours, the working at the 3 different schools to help out, trying to have lunch with all three of the children AT LEAST once a month if not more and fundraisers, social gatherings, conferences, school pictures, buying things for teacher wish lists(which I NEVER will complain about because I believe it is SO important).  Then, add in my husband and my activities, we have a standing date night every Monday night(why our children don't do anything on Mondays), me in the process of planning my 20th high school reunion, my book club, my new Beth Moore study at church, and my husband and I belonging to a dinner club, well life is busy.

It is a good busy though!  Truly it is.  I think it is a good problem to have trying to figure out a time when Grandma can take your almost 7 year old to American Girl to get her first American Girl doll.  YES...don't tell our almost 7 year old but, she is finally getting one and she will flip out!  I also think it is a good problem trying to figure out how to get my daughter to a birthday party and the other daughter to gymnastics plus, feed everyone dinner.  Or how and when to give my almost 7 year old her bike from Grandma and Grandpa (yes...don't tell her!)  See, these are good problems to have, really good problems.

We are busy and I frankly don't know how we are going to manage some of our nights this year but, we always have figured it out in the past so, we can do it again this year.  God has blessed us with so much!  We have been blessed with great friends, great communities, great children, great schools and a great church, of course we want to be as involved in all of those things as possible!

I do have to say though, I do not know how working moms do it.  Seriously, how on Earth do they do doctors appointments, dentist appointments and not just for their children but, them too!  Then, conferences, sports, and social time.  I am exhausted at the end of my days, I couldn't imagine how tired I would be trying to do all this and work at the same time.

Oh...I almost forgot, we are doing all these activities and we have a 15 month old at home too!  She was lucky enough to go to a meeting with me today and by the way, she was perfect!  Thank you baby.  Life is truly very busy and I am sure we are one of those over booked families however, the children LOVE their activities for the most part.  They don't enjoy church choir as much as I believe they should but, that is NOT an option to quit so...smile children :-)

Maybe I am pushing too much on myself too trying to do book club, dinner club, soccer, and a Bible study but, I need activities too and I need to see my friends and have adult time.  Ok, so should we cancel our date nights...no way, our marriage is the pillar of strength to our family and our date nights are extremely important to keeping a strong and happy marriage.  So, looks like the busy schedules will just continue and that is OK.

This is why I don't work, this is my job of sorts.  I have always said I am 'retired' and I have scoffed when mothers say, I work I just do it in the home.  Well, I am finally going to agree with them!  I do work and it is exhausting!!!!  But, it is by far the best job I have ever had even though the vacation time sucks! hahaha.

I will tell you all though, I am taking my first ever time away from my family next weekend!  Yes, I have NEVER been away from my children!  Never.  The longest time I was ever away from any of my children has been around 12 hours.  So, this is truly going to be a new adventure for me and I hope it is just the beginning of my mini vacations from the children.  I am hoping my employer(my family) is finally going to start allowing for more mommy vacation time.  I am not nervous, although...I am worried a bit about the baby as my hubby tends to step on her a lot but, other than that, I am ready.  I think 8 1/2 years of working without a vacation...well, it is just time now.

It is a mini-weekend vacation up to the cabin but, oh how great it will be.  I just hope the weather cooperates and isn't too cold or rainy as I will be driving the convertible up and I love driving up there with the top down.

Anyway, way off subject there, can you tell I am a bit excited?!

So, today, think about your family, think about your schedules and don't forget to schedule time for your spouse and yourself.  It is so important for your children to see you doing things for yourself and you and your spouse doing things without them.  Enjoy your life, no matter how busy or easy going it is, for it will all go by so fast.

I love my life, I love my hectic schedule and I love filling out what seems to be millions of forms a year.  Life is good and these are the days our children will look back on hopefully with fond and funny memories.

Blessings to you all!

-Liza

True Friends.

Good Afternoon!

I don't know what the weather is like where you live but here, it is glorious!  The sun is out, it is mid-70's and not a cloud in the sky.  I love weather like this. 
Last night we hosted a BBQ out on an island and the weather was just like this, warm not too buggy and the almost full moon and cloudless/starry night overlooking the water, wow.  The lake was like glass and not a soul was out there but, our group.  It was perfect.  I would like to say I had something to do with it but, we were just blessed.

As I sit here and write this while the baby is sleeping, which could mean the end of my blog writing at any moment, I think back over the summer, think back to new and old friends.  How truly blessed I am with not only the quantity but, the quality of good friends I have in my life right now.  It seems like each year a new friend or two come into my life adding so much more to my life I ever thought possible.

As I look back not only over the past summer but, over the past few years, only one thing comes to my mind, God is good!  The people that God has put into my life has truly been a blessing beyond anything I could comprehend.  We all come together as a group, like last night and we blend and blend well. 

Long gone are the days of worrying about, 'what will my friends think' or 'I can't dress this way, I need to dress that way' or thoughts like that.  Slowly fading over the past few years has been those lingering thoughts of insecurities, self-doubt and I am not good enough feelings.  I now find myself surrounded by not only all walks of life, economic, age, job, background but, people of faith.  People that are filled with faith and have great hearts that see people for who they are not who they know or what they have.

A few weeks ago I struggled with not feeling good enough, my self worth plummeted, my self esteem seemed to be non-existent and I found myself not feeling happy with my life.  All because of some 'old' friends that I had struggled for years to feel good enough to be there friend.  To feel good enough to hang out with them and to be thin enough, dress well enough, have enough money, workout enough, be good enough in sports, have the cute children, have the well behaved children, every thing with them seemed like a competition and I seemed to always lose.

After last night and looking back over my summer filled with book clubs, dinner dates, concerts, cabin weekends, BBQ's and boating, I realized one big thing....I HAVE the friends I am supposed to have.  I have the people in my life who fill me up, who lift me up, who love me for me, who love my family, love my husband, and who I truly love in return.  We all have children around the same ages, we are all growing and learning and laughing together.  Some of us, live very different lives but, when we are together, it all just comes together effortlessly.

THAT is what true friendship is all about.  Friendship isn't about making someone feel bad, it isn't about comparing the haves and have nots.  It isn't trying to out dress, out diet, out earn, or out Botox.  It is about loving your friends for who they are, for how they make you better, for how your time together is filled with laughs and sometimes tears.  For when your children are mis-behaving, they aren't judging you because theirs did the same thing last week!  Or when your budget and your husbands budget don't seem to be the same, they listen, they console, they help(if needed) but, they never judge.

You can make a mistake and say you are sorry and never be afraid that you might lose that friendship for saying the wrong thing.

True friends, true friends are truly a gift from God.  It doesn't matter if you have 2 good friends or 30 good friends.  True friends are a lifeline.  I need them in my life to help me through motherhood, being a wife, being a good friend, being me. 

For the first time in my life, I find myself surrounded by a group of people that I can truly call friends.  That I know will be there in one form or another for the rest of my life.  The people that are here now are the same people that will be there when my children finish school like they are here now when my children are beginning school.  These are the people I am going to gray in front of, wrinkle in front of, and sag in front of and you know what?  They will still love me and be there for me.  They won't notice every gray hair, line or age spot.  They don't care if I put on a few pounds, they love ME.  The real me, the inside me, the me that God created and wants ME to be.

So I ask you, as you sit back and remember this past summer, are you surrounded by true friends or the friends you have to compete with?  Are you still hanging out with the same group of people you always have been just because they are comfortable but, they offer you nothing to grow from? 

Remember, this is New Years, this is the time to make a new start and to take control of your life, your friendships, and your faith. 

I am no longer going to yearn for friends that I have nothing in common with, that don't love me for me.  I am no longer going to try to accumulate more things to feel better about myself and my life.  I don't need that.  I truly am in the right spot for me.  I am with the people God wants me to be with and I am living the life God has put in front of me and I will do it all joyfully.

Thank God for good friends, good memories, and good times.  This past summer was one of my favorites and it brought me closer to the good things in life, friends.

Blessings to all of you!

-Liza

Happy New Year!

Good Morning Everyone!

Oh it has been so long, so much to talk about!  I really need to figure out how to post by mobile because I have so many good blogs that go in and out of my mind through the day/week.

I still know what the blog topics were and what I was going to say but, the passion, the emotions behind the words are gone and it is hard for me to write a good blog without emotion.

I haven't written in a while but, looking at all of you still reading me daily (or those of you who read me weekly/monthly and catching up) wow, truly shows how many people I have following my blogs!  Thank you.

There is one blog in particular that comes up the most in searches for people and that by far has had the most people read it over any other blog I have posted.  The blog 'movie nights and family time' or something like that.  I can't remember the exact title but, it was one I wrote a long time ago.  Huh, isn't it funny that something I wrote about just about my family and an evening we spent together at home watching old Disney movies would become the most read blog?! 
I love how things work like that in writing. 

Lately I have been trying to get my blog more 'out there' in more readers.  I talked to Star Tribune about becoming one of there community guest bloggers and was email 'interviewed' but, that was almost 2 weeks ago so, I guess that means I didn't make the cut?  Maybe the Outspoken Mom was just a bit too outspoken for the Star Tribune.  Maybe next time I should try something a bit more conservative?  Not sure.

It is a bittersweet deal for me right now.  School is starting Wednesday for my 3rd and my other 2 start next Tuesday.  I am thrilled that they are starting school again so I can get back to my blogs but, sad because my baby(my baby of the older 3) is starting Kindergarten and she really is my mini-me and I love having her around.
It is those rowdy older two that need to get back into school!  lol. 

So as I sit here listening to my baby's music in her crib play and listen to my loud, just like his father, son jump and talk and run around downstairs I wonder, what will this year bring to the Schwab family?

How will the Schwab's change/grow this year?  I tend to think of a new school year like many people think of New Years.  New school years to me are 'new years'.  I don't think of my years from January to December, my years are from September to June.  What new things is my family going to experience, how will we all change, how will we look back on this year in the future?
As my children grow, I wonder how many teeth will get lost and grow back in this year, which new families/friends will come into our lives, will any friends from last year move to the side?  How will we impact the world around us and how will the world around us impact us.

Will my husband's company grow or shrink?  Will my waistline grow or shrink...lol, just kidding, had to throw that one in there :-)  But, seriously THIS time of year is my new year.  My calendars don't start in January, they all start in September and go through the next December.  With 4 children, that is how you plan...always about 3-4 months in advance.  Crazy. 

So as I plan on having my 3 older children at 3 different schools living 3 completely different lives Monday through Friday during the day, how will our family change?  How will my children change?  How will I keep 3 schedules from being messed up?! 

To me, a new school year brings all the new beginnings, the hopes, the wishes, the new starts.  This is the time for wondering what the 'new' year will bring.

I am not one to really make new year resolutions but, what are yours this new school year?  What are your hopes, dreams, prayers for you, your children and your family?  I pray for safety, I pray for peace in my heart, I pray for patience, forgiveness, love.  I pray for my son to finally find his 'best friend' in life.  I pray for my oldest daughter to continue to blossom in 'her' world, I pray for my 2nd daughter to continue to shine and be surrounded by good friends with tender hearts, I pray for my littlest Schwab to continue to grow and thrive and to be happy even without her big brother and sisters around all the time to entertain her.
For my husband, I pray for patience, I pray for good business, good partners, and good clients.  I pray he continues to love what he does and he finally is able to start enjoying all of the hard work he has been doing in growing his company for the past 2 years.

Hmm, for me.  I pray for patience, kindness, and a new-found, renewed faith in my Lord.  I pray for wisdom in raising my children, organization in my schedule and calendar and I pray for time.  I pray I will take time to stop and enjoy the moment, enjoy the ages of my children now, enjoy my friends, and enjoy my husband.  I pray for the NOW, not the past, not the future, the NOW.

What will you being praying for this year?

Blessings to you all!

-Liza

Friendships, life and Faith.

Good Morning Everyone!

I am veering off my Food Allergies blogs for a moment.  I decided today to talk about something so important...friends.

Last night I was very blessed to be able to hang out on a boat with some other moms for an evening.  It was wonderful, on so many levels.
Just being out on the lake on a warm summer night, no children, no husbands, just 5 friends sharing stories and time together.

I think so often in the rush of life, we forget how important it is to connect with friends, especially true for us moms.  I was always the girl that hung out with the boys, they were easier for me to be friends with.  I never really had a group of 'girl friends' that I just did stuff with and giggled with and walked through life.

Ohhh, a little interruption here...my beautiful little girls just walked past my office.  They were dressed up in their finest dress up clothes, shoes and jewelry.  One had her pink backpack on and the other had her cowgirl hat and a pink bag with her, it was a firestorm of pink that was standing before me!  They waved to me, blew me kisses and said, "Goodbye Momma, we are going on an airplane."  I looked at them, blew them kisses and told them, "Adios".  Then, as they walked down the hallway, I heard one say to the other one, "Should we go to Colorado?" 
Oh, my heart is over-flowing with love right now:-)

Ok, back to the blog....

I guess I have always missed the meaning of girl friends until the past few years.  Really, I have missed the true value of friendship overall for years.  Slowly, women are pulling me out of my comfort zone and pulling me into friendships and relationships that I could have never expected or even known how much I needed.

The stories that were shared, the things we all learned about one another in 6 short hours was nothing but a miracle set before us by God I am sure. 

See, what I haven't shared with anyone is lately, my faith has been wavering.  Not because of any tragedies or really for any particular reason but, for over the past couple of years, my faith has slowly been slipping away it seems.  Actually, let me rephrase that, my faith in God is strong, I believe in God, I believe Jesus Christ is my Savior but...lately, my prayers have seemed empty, almost forced.  My faith has seemed forced or like I am just saying what I think needs to be said, or praying what I think needs to be prayed with no heart, no love behind those prayers.

With all of my children in public schools, weekends this summer at the cabin and no church, things are just sort of slipping away for me with my faith.

I truly believe God put last night into my hands and said, "Go."  I believe God put the conversations that we had on the boat there, I believe he was on that boat with us the entire time, guiding conversations, thoughts, and friendships.  I can't even explain how our conversations went, how they spun from one amazing story to another, how God was a constant in our thoughts and words last night.  It truly was the night I needed to bring me out of, for lack of better words, my faith slump.

I think it is very easy to get comfortable with the friends you hang out with all the time.  I think especially for me, it is easy for me to just be with one group because I am not very organized with my time and I am not very comfortable or good at having a lot of friends.  I am much more comfortable(only because it is easier) to have only a few friends.  But, that is not how God designed me or anyone else.  We are to be in a community with others.  We are to walk with others, talk with others, and get out of our comfort zones. 

God never promised us comfort, peace, or security.  We live in a fallen world, nothing is promised. 

If I am to be the woman, the mother, the wife God intended me to be, I need to walk outside of myself and put myself out there, be friends with God's people and be strong in my faith.  I need to be a leader for my family, I need to put my own fears aside and my own weaknesses and stand up and teach my children about God, his love, and his world.  I need to devote myself not only to my family but, to my faith, to my friends, and most importantly, to my God.

No longer can I use excuses about not knowing the Bible or its verses, I need to start memorizing scripture, and living in the word.  I need to read my Bible daily, read it to my children daily and study it, not just read it but, really study it. 

God put me on this Earth for a reason, I don't really know what it is yet but, I will never find out why he put me here if I am always so focused on 'me' instead of Him.

Last night my heart was filled with laughter, love, and God.  Last night I hung out with amazing faith filled women and strong faith filled women.  I learned that all of us struggle with things in our lives.  We all have children, we all struggle with family, health, children, husbands, life.  We all struggle with schooling our children, doing what is right for our children, we all share the same struggles!
The struggles might look different like a hook in the eye compared to a pale white child in a diaper.  But, they are the same struggles and they all bring us back around to each other and to God.

I can't imagine how I lived a life without God for 28 years.  I can't imagine how anyone lives life without God.  I remember how lonely it was and how many lies were believed as truths.

Last night one of my friends hit it straight on.  She was struggling with something with one of her children and in a moment she questioned things, she heard things in her head that she knew were lies, were not of God and she threw them away, threw those thoughts out of her head and 'crash', the words crashed away and her thoughts were clear again to the truth of God.  It was powerful and meaningful and amazing to hear.

As mothers, we often are too busy changing diapers, running children around, picking up the house(not me but, other moms), making meals, and just living everyone else's life but our own.  I strongly believe Satan loves it when we are like that.  He loves it when our lives are hectic, our families are apart, our meals are rushed.  He loves it when our prayers are short, our tempers even shorter, and our days and schedules are long.

I am filled with one excuse after another as to why I don't do things outside of the home, why I don't have the friends I need, why I don't study the Bible like I should, why I don't do Devotions, why I don't have time to do women's Bible study's, or why my children don't have the knowledge and the love for God they should.

It is time to put those excuses away.  Those are the words and thoughts of Satan, not God.  God did not intend for me to be lonely, he did not intend for me to be a stay at home mom that never leaves the house.  He did not intend for me to only have 1 or 2 girl friends I can call at the drop of the hat and talk to.  No.

God designed me to flourish in the company of other God filled women/mothers, he designed me to teach.  He designed me to teach my children not only academics but, also of his patience, his love, and his word.  Why can't I learn along with my children? 

Listen, I know I will never be Martha Stewart, I may always be a bit 'spacey' and disorganized in the home but, I don't have to be that way in my faith and my friendships.

Today, I am stepping out, I am taking back my faith, taking back my love for God and taking back my children and my family and my friends from the lies that Satan fills our heads with.

Thank you dear friends for last night, thank you so much for showing me what a true faith filled life really looks like.  It isn't perfect, it isn't always great and bad things still happen but, when you have the word of the Lord guiding you, it just makes it seems that much easier and that much less lonely to walk through.

I challenge all of you to walk out of your comfort zones, to find those people that fill your life, that fill your spirit.  I challenge you to reconnect.  Find friends you can walk through life with, you can sit on a boat with for 6 hours and never run out of things to say.

Please pray for me and my faith journey as well as my friendships new and old and not yet formed.  Pray for wisdom only God can give me in raising my children and loving my husband.  Just plain pray!

Blessings to you all!!

-Liza

Happy Birthday to me.

Good Morning Everyone!

So yes, as the title suggests, it is my birthday today.  Now, I am not writing a blog about my birthday to gain recognition for my birthday or anything!  In fact, I am usually pretty quiet about my birthdays, not because I don't like getting older, it is more because I don't like drawing attention to myself like that. 

However, the reason I am writing today, this morning is because I was thinking about how boring my birthday is today.  No, not because of the events taking place or not taking place but, because of my age...37.  What a boring age!  I am now officially in my 'late 30's' which when you say it sounds horrible but, 37 just sounds so, dumb.  I remember thinking this way when I turned 27 too.  It was just a dumb age...it must be that '7' number or something. 

Have any of you ever noticed that some ages are just more boring birthdays than others?  37, what does that say to people?  Not much to me.  I could be old, I could be young, I could have gray hair, I could have none.  Wow, very Dr. Seuss sounding there :-)

Really though, what does 37 say?  To me it just says you are probably in the throws of parenthood, you aren't doing much other than focusing on your family and in some cases, you might finally be seeing some of your work start to pay off in your children.  When someone is 37 I think they are in the heights of their career, they are stable and probably in their 'forever' house or currently shopping or remodeling for their forever house.  They are currently driving newer cars and feel secure in their finances.

37 tells me the person is starting to probably feel old or older or wondering(as I am) how did this happen?  I don't feel 37, I don't look 37, really, I am 37?! 

When did the music on the radio get so bad?!  How can the 80's be back in style?  What?!  No one knows who The Go-Go's, Duran Duran, or Pearl Jam is?  The kids now don't know Michael Jackson when he was still black?!  UGH!!  Have you all noticed that all of a sudden the bands at the festivals and State fairs and such are 'really good' bands finally!  Then, you realize they are the bands you like but, no one in high school or college knows who they are?!  Barf....yes, that is 37.

I officially could be my babysitters mom, my husband was a sophomore in college when she was born.  She wears boat shoes now and thinks they are the newest fad...along with leggings, short/short skirts, and ripped and holey jeans. 

Or when I was at the Richfield 4th of July celebration and LOVED the 2 bands because they both played 80's rock and the high school kids all were wearing 80's rock shirts, torn jeans, unlaced tennis shoes, and black eyeliner.  They loved the 'vintage shirts and rock' and all I could think of is 'oh crap', this is just like me in high school wearing 60's crap and listening to 60's and 70's rock.  They are doing a remake of Footloose....Oh no, I am officially oh..I can't even say it...I am officially my mom!  I am the same age she was when I was in high school.  Gross!  She was old, ugly, nagging, and fat!  Plus, she had gray hair(she dyed it of course) but, NO!!!!!!!!!  (insert huge scream here)

I think you now all understand why the master cleanse happened a few weeks ago and why the moods have been a changing and flip flopping.  I remember what my mom was like at this age and I thought she was super old...yet, turns out, she was a very young mom and I am the old mom.  lol.  Life is a bitch isn't it? lol.

So as I am writing this blog, I am sitting here listening to my 80's music, Kenny Loggins is currently on, just got done listening to the Go-Go's, who is next? OH Duran Duran, lol.  The itunes gods must know the type of blog I am writing this morning.

Honestly, and truthfully, I don't feel old, I don't think I am old but, in the scope of things, it sure sounds like I am old sometimes.  I am not fat, I don't have to dye my hair..yet, the wrinkles are still manageable, the boobs still are relatively firm...even after nursing 4 babies..well, at least they aren't pygmy boobs or hanging down to my knees...there is still a bit of substance there :-)  OH, the Go-Go's again!

I still feel good about my looks, my self, and my age frankly.  I am actually excited to be closer to 40 because I think I will look better and better with time which by the way, I always thought was cliche but, in my case so far, it is true.

I really think a lot of what makes a woman look so much better in her 30's and 40's is how you feel about yourself.  Granted, I think the past 10 years of slathering on sunscreen didn't hurt either!  There are still some things that I feel over time will need to be nipped and or tucked a bit here and there (belly from 4 babies) but, everything will just be a minor 'tune-up' and I don't think I will need a major overhaul.

I feel good about myself, I have more confidence than I ever have, I like my life, I love my family, I have great friends and I am living life with a great partner.  Our friends are the people we see ourselves raising our families with and growing old with and my current friends I can definitely say will be a part of my life for the rest of my life.  I feel truly blessed to be surrounded by true, loving people, that love me no matter how fat/skinny, young/old, or gray I am or get....oh ok, here is a song that makes me really feel young and cool...yep, how many 37 year old's have Good Charlotte on their itunes?!  See, I am still hip and young!

The clock doesn't stop running, age will eventually catch up with all of us and we all will get old and look gross eventually...oh yes, I am flipping out about the deep wrinkles, saggy skin and gray hair that is now one year closer than it was this time last year but, for now, I look good, I feel good and I know my friends will love me even when I am wrinkly and gross!  LMAO!

My mouth doctor said something to me yesterday that really got me thinking...he knew today was my bday(on my chart) so, he said to me as I was leaving, "Have a great 29th birthday tomorrow."  I laughed but, as I was walking out the door, I thought of something, you know...I don't look that great for a  29 year old but, I think I am pretty terrific for a 37 year old! 

So, everyone, in case you haven't figured it out, I am 37 today and I am fine with it.  It is a boring age but, thank God my age doesn't define who I am because I certainly am not boring!...ooh...a little Indigo Girls...are they old too?

Blessings to you all!

-Liza

Great books, great sports, great holidays....ain't life great?!

Good Morning Everyone!

Sorry it has been a while since I have written, life just gets busy sometimes as you all know!

First let me tell you how thrilled I am at how many people are starting to find my blog!  Welcome all new readers and I hope you stick around and continue to enjoy my blogs.  I can usually figure out who is reading my blogs and who is finding my blog by who follows me on Twitter. (www.twitter.com)

Just this morning I discovered 2 more people following me on Twitter and I giggled.  One is Master_Cleanse and the other is a twitter page all about reshaping your thoughts on eating.  Obviously they had found my blogs about me doing the Master Cleanse and my issues with food! :-)  So, welcome new blog readers and new followers on my Twitter page. 

This morning my husband is playing golf with 2 of his really good friends as no one had to work today!  Yay!  I love it when my husband gets the opportunity to play golf.  It is one of the few sports her truly enjoys and really likes to do.  Plus, I secretly (well....not secret anymore!) love that he can kick butt in golf.  Actually, my husband kicks everyone's butt in most sports.  He doesn't play any sports anymore but, when the time comes or he has to, he goes out and plays and just kicks butt, every time!  I love being married to an awesome athlete that no one ever sees coming.  It is fun.

I wish my husband actually played sports more often but, I should just be happy he does anything once in a while!  As he really doesn't enjoy many sports other than golf even though he is amazingly talented.  Oh, he does enjoy skiing as much as golf.  Those two activities have stayed with him from his youth and still bring him great joy when he does them. 

Both sports of which, I do not play.  Sucks.  But, as a mother of 4, how am I supposed to play a sport that takes an average of 4 hours to play?!  Then, skiing....oh yea right.  I don't like heights and I don't like speed.  Plus, I don't like being cold.

I would like to learn how to ski well enough that I could ski with my family and be able to swoosh down the hill leisurely.  I want to be like one of those old guys that just slowly glides down the hill going side to side seemingly without a care in the world. 

As for golf, it is a sport I have wanted to play since I was young.  I have to get over myself and my mother's words that constantly roll through my head about not only golf but, skiing, and tennis.  'Only rich people or talented people play those sports'.  Or her many fears cast into me over the years of, 'you could get hurt', 'oh, I would NEVER do that', or 'it is too expensive, such a waste of time and money'.

I just finished one of our July book club books this morning and found myself strangely understanding how the author felt and so mad that the father didn't try harder to save his daughter.  After finishing the book, I realized a lot of the feelings and things the mother in that book did to her daughter and how her daughter felt and thought as an adult, are very similar(albeit very different) to the same feelings/thoughts I have about my childhood.

The book is called "Swallow the Ocean" by Laura Flynn.  It is a memoir however, it feels like it is written more as a story and it didn't take very long for me to get into the book.  Nor did it take me very long to read the book.

Now, this book is about a family where the mother suffers from Paranoid Schizophrenia, my mother does not have any other mental illness other than fear running through her so, that is not the same.  It is hard to explain but, I felt strangely connected to the author.

It is a very good book, I think, even if you come from a completely 'normal' family, I would still highly recommend this book.  It isn't necessarily dark, it is just a good story most of the time.  It didn't hit me until I got to the end of the book....looked at the picture and read the acknowledgments then I teared up.  

Great summer read as most of her memories are of the summers.

I need to end this here, my children are all finally awake (it is 10am!) and they are about ready to eat me for breakfast so, I need to hurry and feed them!

If I don't write tomorrow, have a great and safe 4th of July!  Oh!!!!  Let me give you all a few tips on creating family traditions for the 4th if you don't already have some or if you need new ones. 

Family 4th Traditions:

-Most important in my eyes....Hang an American Flag!  This is a great country, lets celebrate our freedom!  Please remember a few simple laws about the American Flag.  It MUST be made in America(it is a law now), it cannot be hung in inclement weather, if flying at night, it must ALWAYS be lit, and it can never be torn or frayed.  These are simple laws about our flag that need to be followed!

-Wear red, white and blue.  It seems simple enough but, many people don't.  You don't have to be glammed out.

-Say a prayer of thanksgiving that you were born or are able to live in the land of the free. 

Food ideas for the 4th of July.  Have a 4th of July feast with family and/or friends.  This is a GREAT time to have a block party and to get to know your neighbors.

-Go All-American with your menu:  hot dogs, hamburgers, potato salad, potato chips, and baked beans!  Make an apple or cherry pie and enjoy!

-Decorate in red, white and blue and go crazy!

-Find some silly recipes, make a jello cake with cool whip frosting and make the flag on top using blueberries and strawberries!

-Serve red punch with blueberry ice cubes....yum, yum!

These are some tips from the fantastic book called "Creating Family Traditions making memories in festive seasons" by Gloria Gaither and Shirley Dobson.

I highly recommend this book for all seasons of the year and your life!

Blessings to you all!

-Liza

Passive Aggressive vs Aggressive?

Good Morning Everyone!

So this morning I am venting.  I just don't understand why I am the 'bad guy' so often when I tell the truth or I tell people things that are going on in my life.  Why is that bad?  I don't understand.

When something bothers me, I tell people.  I have discovered over the years that holding it in, just makes me explode in some pretty dumb and embarrassing ways so, I try to say what is on my mind and not hold too much in.

Yes, I still hold in the hurtful things that would really hurt people's feelings but, I feel like I am not out of line in telling people some things that aren't hurtful, more informative or funny.

I just don't understand if people have a problem with something or someone and they bitch and moan to everyone else BUT, that person they have an issue with.  What?!  How does that solve anything?  Maybe that is my problem, I think I can solve issues when I should keep my mouth shut?  I am not sure.

Maybe people just like to bitch sometimes and not have people solve their issues, I do that on occasion.  A lot of times, I just want to vent my frustrations(like now) but, I don't necessarily want someone to fix the issues. 

I just don't understand if I am out of line or if it is because other people don't like confrontation.

Ok, let me give you all an example.  If I did something that was wrong or hurt someone's feelings and I wasn't aware of it, I would like to know about it.  I don't want that person telling everyone else about it and no one telling me.  At the same time, I don't want to be bombarded by it either but, I think there is a happy medium.

I said some things to a good friend of mine about something we did with them and we got scolded a bit by someone else for doing that when we didn't think it would be a big deal.  Well, after we got scolded, I told the other people that were with us that we got a little talking to about it after wards. 

Apparently I wasn't supposed to say that to them.  Apparently, that was one of those moments I should have kept to myself.  I don't really understand what the harm was but, there was a bit of a confrontation about it.  Not a bad one by any means but, one of the people was a bit taken back by it all.

Well, I am sorry.  It was not meant to be that way, it in no way was supposed to be anything about the other people with us, it was supposed to be directed at us.

I know that this probably makes no sense to anyone but, then again, maybe it does.

My question is:  Is it better to hold things in and keep them to yourself or is it better to be open and honest? 

When do we know with whom and when we are supposed to be open and honest and when we are supposed to hold it in?

I am not good with these social 'rules'.  This is where I am am a bit socially delayed.  I don't understand what is right and wrong in these situations.  All I know is I tell my good friends things, and when it comes to my life, I like to share my life...good, bad, or indifferent.

I am learning that isn't always to best. 

Anyway, UGH, man I just vented got myself feeling good again and my husband just woke up the baby!  UGH!!!!!!!

Anyway, all is good, blessings to you all and get out and enjoy the beautiful summer day.

-Liza