My new website is up and running! From now on, you will find my blog posts at http://www.outspokenmomblog.com
Please come visit me there and make sure to join or bookmark the new site! The site is still growing so come grow with me!
Sincerely,
The Outspoken Mom, Liza
Good Evening Everyone!
I couldn't do it, I couldn't wait any longer to write! I am going nuts trying to build my own website for my new blog and frankly, it is very frustrating. I just want to write, I don't want to be a computer programmer!
Life has been so great the past couple of weeks, yes things are still stressful with hubby's job and life is still busy with 4 great little people however, last week and this week have been awesome! Last week our Kindergartner was on Spring Break and this week she is back at school and my 3rd and 1st Graders are out! But, as most of you know my 6 year old only goes to Kindergarten MWF so, today was a glorious day of nothing to do but, hang out and have fun! Top off the no schedules, no stress weeks and we are watching our friends dog Toffee for 10 days while they are in Florida. He has been quite the addition to our little family and frankly, I am going to miss the guy when he goes.
So, as my husband is really starting to worry about me getting a 2nd dog, in addition to our cat and our 2 hermit crabs on top of the 4 children and our 2200 sq ft house, life is good. I also started taking Ritalin last week again for the first time since 2005. It has helped me so much with just relaxing and being able to enjoy the day and enjoy my children. It hasn't cured our over-cluttered house issue but, it is helping me at least start one project and actually stick with that project and not get bored! I even finished an entire load of dishes one day, truly a miracle there people. Yes, dishes are so insanely boring to me, I often quit with only one glass left, or quit clearing the table with just silverware left after clearing about 20 dishes and glasses off.
Yep, this momma is actually starting to FINISH some things! Granted, I am still tackling WAY too big of jobs but, it is ok, the stress is gone and my head is clearer. Although, I have discovered that part of what made me a blogger was those scattered thoughts running rampant through my head 24/7. I might need to become a late night blogger instead, after the pills have worn off and my mind has had time to fill itself up again. My mind still races while laying in bed so, I have found myself needing to go to bed a bit later or SUPER tired otherwise, I just lay there with a million things running laps in my head, driving me nuts.
I even find my temper a bit more in check on Ritalin. I know, I am such a hypocrite. Here I am that mom that says over and over again, no drugs, no drugs, no drugs, clean living, good diet and no drugs. I still believe parents should try to avoid putting their children on drugs at all cost. As it has been proven that drugs like Ritalin and Adderall change the physiological make up of the brain in children which is NOT a good thing.
However, no such testing has shown that happening in adult brains(when adults start taking those drugs). Also, frankly I am truly experimenting right now. I started taking Ritalin because I thought I was going to be homeschooling my son starting next Monday for the rest of the year and I knew I didn't have the patience nor the discipline to be able to do it all without a bit of 'help'. I truly found myself at the end of my rope, many times and found myself over-whelmed and over-stressed and frankly very short in my temper. It wasn't fair to my children and my son truly needs a more organized home, schedule and life so, I am trying this drug thing to see how it goes.
Obviously as with everything, I will let you all know how it is going. I plan to only take it until June and maybe try it again in September as I don't need to be organized in the summer! Hence why these past two weeks have been such a delight to our family. No evening activities, no school, very little homework and just fun.
Off to bed I go, I think I am finally tired enough to calm my brain enough to fall asleep.
Blessings to you all!
-Liza
Hi all!
I just wanted to let you all know, I am in the process of building my blog into a true blogging site with hopefully many different aspects to it. I am working on getting my blog to be more things to more people and hopefully to really turn this into something that people not only read for entertainment or because they like me but, to also turn to for help and to truly become a part of my blog and to create a true blogging community.
If I can figure it all out...the new community will consist of local and small business owners/advertisers, most of which are other moms! It will also consist of guest bloggers writing about their lives and blog posts related to and in connection with my own postings. I am also hoping to get some sort of forum going too.
So, as I work on redesigning my current blog, my posts might not be as frequent or as long but, if I can get this all done, the outspoken mom will be more things to more people and I am excited to see where it will go from here.
I do have to tell you all, this seems to be where God is leading me as many doors are opening for me and my blog right now that I never could have imagined. He has been putting amazing people into my life lately and frankly, I thought I already had some pretty awesome people in my life already! But, lately he is showing me and leading me to people from all over the place and from all walks of life and I feel truly blessed to be in a 'community' with them all.
So, I hope you all continue to walk with me and to stay with me through this growing process and stay tuned.......
-Liza
Sleep is SO over-rated. At least that is what I am telling myself to talk myself into wanting to be awake and to be joyful in being awake. So far, not working very well.
Good Morning Everyone!
This blog is going to be short and sweet, my dad is coming over this morning to surprise the children before they go off to school so, I only have a few minutes. By the way, have you ever noticed that you can type super fast when you are not in a hurry with very few mistakes but, add that 'hurry' factor in and you have two left hands?
So, yesterday was my 6 month appointment for my teeth cleaning with my dentist. You know, we go twice a year to have our teeth cleaned and checked, once a year for x-rays and that is all your insurance covers. Well, they also cover if you have a filling and a few other things and that is it.
Yesterday, I was informed by my dentist as he was finishing up that 'they' (not quite sure who 'they' are but, I can guess...) recommend going to the dentist once a year instead of twice a year so my insurance as of January 1, 2010 will only cover 1 dentist visit/cleaning a year and x-rays once a year plus if you have a filling. Then he said, "However, I highly recommend you continue to come in every 6 months, you will have to unfortunately pay for your other appointment but, I urge you to continue coming twice a year." Of course I will go there still twice a year, I have learned over my 37 years of being alive that a cavity or any other mouth issue can come up pretty fast and you might be fine one dentist visit and the next you have a cavity.
So, I went up front to schedule my next appointment and found out it will cost me $143 out of my pocket for my next appointment. OK, not bad but, considering that my insurance premiums didn't go down and my coverage did, ouch. So instead of me paying $6 a year to visit my dentist (my co-pays are $3 each) I will now be paying $146 a year instead.
Now, if I couldn't afford to pay that extra $143 a year, I would have to choose the 'new and improved' guidelines and risk my mouth health. Now, of course, my insurance does cover cavities however, it does NOT cover root canals or any repair work needed or treatment for gum disease. So, only going once a year raises those risk and of course, those costs to me!
This is my 2nd experience running into the 'new health care' recommendations put forth lately. A few months ago I had my yearly physical and my doctor told me I needed a Mammogram. What? I am only 37 and no history of breast cancer or any cancer for that matter in my family. He said he is 'highly recommending' (there is that phrase again!) all women between the ages of 35-40 go in for a mammogram so, I did. It was crazy, they got me in immediately (well next day) and as I was getting my boobs squished, I asked the woman if this was because of health care reform. She quickly told me that most doctors were trying to get their female patients between 35-40 in as fast as possible, before the new guidelines took effect which said women don't need a mammogram until age 50.
Wow, so there, without me even looking I have already seen 2 changes to my regular health care and one was before the new bill even passed and the other well, I guess that one happened before the new bill passed too since it was implemented Jan 1st.
I wish I could talk more about this but, I need to go! Just wanted to give you all a little insight into what might be happening with our 'new and improved' health care.
Blessings to you!
-Liza
I just added this blog to by blog faves....check out this story about a Happy Meal and be prepared to never want McDonald's again!
Where to begin, where even to begin!
So tonight, I was watching that TV show with Jamie Oliver about his food revolution. UGH!!!! I was getting so stressed out and so upset during that show! I could honestly feel my blood starting to boil and I could feel my heart racing and many times I had to change the channel because I couldn't handle what I was seeing on TV.
Many of you who read my blogs understand how I feel about food, the struggles our family has had with food and how frustrating it has been to watch children be fed crap, day after day in not only our own homes but, at schools, restaurants and wherever else we eat. I have always struggled with restaurants not having healthy food options on children's menus, I struggle with fast food places and their options, I struggle with grocery stores and food companies that market this crap to our children! To see it all flat out right in front of me in High Definition...it was honestly too much to take.
I sat there and watched as someone who isn't from our country tried and changed our schools and tried to change a towns minds and he was put up against our own government! Our own government was telling him that his chicken, rice, and veggies wasn't following standards but, the reheated pizza the lunch ladies were serving was! Turns out their guidelines said there must be 2 breads in their lunch and he didn't have a bread but, their crappy, unhealthy pizza constituted 2 bread servings..how you ask? By the portion size...yep, they just gave them bigger pieces of crappy pizza to make sure they were following the guidelines set forth by the USDA, our own government!
To top that off, just as my blood is really starting to boil, the show gets interrupted and I find out from a gleeful Diane Sawyer that our own government...the VERY government that is telling us pizza is better for you than brown rice has voted to take over our health care system. If ever I needed a push to be against something it was that....not only hearing my government is telling people what is healthy and what isn't and being SO very wrong but, also having a show about our health and food issues interrupted to find out our government will now be making our health decisions for us now too.
I am sure I am going to piss a lot of you off with this blog and so be it. Listen, I am so anti-government right now it is sad to me. I have never been so afraid, so ashamed, and so scared of my country's leaders before. After seeing many sick things our government can do and is doing to people in the business world, my husband included, and then seeing what they are doing to our children, how on earth can I trust them with my health too?
I flat out don't trust the government anymore, I don't trust them, I am afraid for my country but, most importantly, I am afraid for my children and what will happen to them. I am watching a country I have believed in, trusted and loved become something I am growing to despise and flat out don't trust.
First of all, let me tell you something about food, the way we eat, what we are feeding ourselves and our children, will kill all of us! Our government is creating a food pyramid that doesn't work and can't possibly be full-filled in our society. Our children don't know what vegetables are, they don't know how they grow or where they grow and we are feeding our children things that come from a box.
Our produce sections are getting smaller and smaller because our grocery sections of pre-packaged, processed foods is getting larger and larger. Nothing that comes from a box can possibly be healthy! I don't care if you make $20,000 a year or $200,000 a year, you can still feed your children healthy food! Our bodies are our temples we need to treat them as such! We workout and diet and then go home and have frozen pizza for dinner!
The diet industry is a multi-billion dollar industry in the United States! We have diet sodas, diet candy bars, diet shakes, diet pills, diet, diet, diet, diet! If we would just go back to eating the basic, WHOLE FOODS, we wouldn't need so many diets! Examples? OK, I just lost 20 pounds in less than 2 months by doing a simple thing..I ate 2 fruits or veggies (raw/uncooked) before every meal! Then, my meal would consist of something like baked chicken, salad, frozen peas(obviously heated up), and a bowl of cut up fruit...NOT from a can! I would have water with my meal, every meal.
I actually found myself never hungry, never craving sugar or other unhealthy foods, always satisfied with my meals and never the over-stuffed feeling I would have when I didn't eat raw fruits or veggies. I was a good example to my children, especially my son who also eats a lot of raw fruits and veggies and lean meats. I showed him joyfully that the food was good and healthy and made me feel good. Soon, my son who often craved sweets and junk food stopped all together craving those things and stopped feeling like he was missing out on the 'good foods' his friends all got to eat. Why? Because he was feeling better, he was happier, he wasn't as agitated and he had more energy than before. He was happy and it was noticeable not only to me his mom but, to him!
Ever hear the old saying, "You are what you eat"? Well, what are we if we eat chicken nuggets, hot dogs, french fries, boxed macaroni and cheese, and pizza? We are junk, we are unhealthy, we are created in a laboratory! However, if we fill ourselves with fresh strawberries, bananas, lettuce, chicken, brown rice, carrots, lean meats, and green peppers what are we? We are whole, we are healthy, we are filled with life created from the earth!
If you don't know what healthy foods are, think of this, if you can't grow it, you shouldn't eat it! Try that for a few weeks and see how you feel! I promise you, if you stop following our government and their misleading guidelines, you truly will feel a lot better and you will be healthier and you won't need to rely on the government , that is helping to make us sick in the first place, to take care of you when you get sick.
I could write on this for hours!
Blessings to you all!
-Liza
Good Afternoon Everyone!
I had no intention of writing a blog today but, apparently, God had other plans! Ok Lord, I am listening and following.
I wish I could tell you all how much God is pushing my husband and I right now, in a good push of course. It is amazing how much he is talking to us and the people he is bringing into our lives right now. You CAN NOT tell me this is all just a coincidence. Just too many factors coming into play here. Anyway, on to the blog.
Food, yes food again. Food is an issue in our house. Actually, I take offense to that! Food isn't an issue in OUR house because we don't find issue with it, the world, our family and our friends have issue with our food 'issues'. How we eat has become the norm in our family and many families like us so much that very rarely do our children even complain or talk about it until it is pointed out to them by someone else.
Today is that day when someone pointed it out to my son. My son who hasn't complained about his food choices or what others may call limitations in weeks did this afternoon. I got a phone call from his school about 15 minutes ago telling me it was someone's last day at that school today and they brought in ice cream for a treat. OK, first of all, ice cream for a treat, for what? A celebration that you are leaving that school, a birthday that coincides with you leaving that school, are you graduating early (they are in 3rd Grade so THAT probably isn't it) but, why a 'treat'?
Our society focuses so much on food that it is no wonder we have children that are obese, children with eating disorders earlier and earlier in life, a multi-billion dollar a year diet industry and in general, millions of people obsessed with food or staying away from food! Add to that children with food allergies or sensitivities and it is crazy!
So, I answer the phone and my son's special ed teacher tells me that the class is eating ice cream and my son would like to eat some and wondering if it is OK. First of all, is it NOT in his IEP that he can not eat ANYTHING unless it comes from home? Also, it is in his files and on his medical forms in many different places that he is not allowed to eat wheat or dairy...hello?! So, after all of those thoughts go through my head, I calmly and kindly say, "Oh, bummer, no he can't have any ice cream". She then tells me why the class is eating ice cream and that my son feels left out..."of course he does, wouldn't you?" is what I want to say but, instead I calmly and kindly say, "Well, he can't have any." She then asks me if I would be willing to tell him that. Sure(chicken sh**, is what I think but, do not say). So, my son gets on the phone and I am super excited to hear his sweet voice come on the phone and hear, "Hi Momma!" OH, my heart melts every time I hear that from him! So I excitedly say hello to him and ask him about his day and chit chat with him. Then, I say to him, "So, I hear someone is leaving and they brought ice cream for a treat." His voice instantly changes into a hint of sadness when he says, "yea".
I then let him know I just found out about it and that his baby sister is still sleeping and school gets out in 15 minutes so, there is no way I would be able to bring him a snack to school but, I promise him he can have a snack when he gets home. He protests. I then remind him that ice cream has not only dairy but, often wheat, corn syrup and sugar in it too, all things he can't eat.
He gets bummed out a bit more but, understands. It is hard to hear an 8 year old have to make such grown up decisions! You know, he has to be so grown up so often in life being the oldest and only boy in the family but, then you add his food choices, his Asperger's, the huge amount of supplements/vitamins he needs to take, and no wonder he sometimes lashes out in school! He is so grown up in so many other areas when is he allowed to just be an 8 year old boy?!
We end our conversation on a good note and we hang up. Then, the blogging comes in. I have had many conversations with other parents about food. See, in Minnesota it is a State Law that you cannot have any food brought in to share unless it is store purchased and in many cases has the ingredients label on it. That is also why there is no sharing of school lunches anymore or trading of snacks. I get it because of food allergies the no trading of school lunches and such however, when you put a law in there to 'protect' children with food allergies by telling us everything needs to be store bought, you are actually excluding many of those same children from classroom activities and parties.
There are VERY few choices for school treats to bring that are wheat/gluten free, dairy/casein free, and then you add in corn syrup, sugar, and egg free and you have pretty much eliminated my son and sometimes my daughter's from participating with their classmates. Now, for my son, who is already dis-engaged often and pulled out frequently and misses a lot of 'normal' class time and class participation, you further alienate him by bringing in treats such as ice cream, cupcakes, candy, etc. for parties. The hardest pill to swallow with all of this is, NOT once has any parent ever asked the teacher if there are any food allergies in the classroom they should be aware of. Something I never forget NOT to do. I always ask about food allergies when I bring in treats. But, more often than not, I try to bring in 100% juice boxes or fruit snacks that are 100% fruit. I wish I could bring in cupcakes and cookies but, I have to make those things for my children and I can't share them with the rest of the class. Very often, I ask the teachers to let me know in advance so that I can either make something just for my children or I can go to one of our local gluten free/dairy free bakeries and pick something up for my children.
Very often though, I get a call just minutes before the treats are served with the teacher telling me they didn't know the parents were bringing anything in, the parents just surprised the teacher and class with treats. Again, first of all, we all love surprises but, you need to tell teachers in advance and two, hello...once again did you ever think someone in the class might not be able to eat what you bring and you might be leaving someone out?
Same goes for all those sporting events that all of us parents bring treats to, whatever happened to a parent bringing a gigantic bag of cut up oranges and some water in a thermos with cups? Since when do 6 year olds need to drink Gatorade and Goldfish to replenish themselves after a soccer game? We don't need to celebrate every single occasion in life with food and drink especially sugary snacks and high fat, high calorie things do we?
I am afraid that we all are a bit guilty in this epidemic we call obesity. Everything is usually OK in moderation (unless you have a food allergy) but, how much is moderation when weekly if not more our children are having parties in school, playing how many sports a week with how many snacks after wards and then you add drive-thru dinners, take-outs and pizza delivery and before you know it your children's diets consist of mostly saturated fats, various corn syrups, food coloring, and preservatives than fruits and veggies.
Hey, I am in no way saying our treats need to disappear from schools or from sporting events but, how about a treat at the END of the soccer season instead of every game? Or how about we only celebrate birthdays or holidays and instead of only bringing in cupcakes and ice cream we once in a while include something fun like a grab bag of non-edible treats to students or little wrapped gifts for everyone in the class of some 'goodies' to make them all feel special?
I need to stop here, 2 of my 3 are home from school and the baby is now awake too and we have dance pictures tonight that I need to somehow get hair done for and make sure the costume is primped and ready to go so my daughter looks her 'best' for pictures.
Thanks for reading and be on the look out for some hopefully big changes coming to this site soon! :-) I am hoping to do an 'official' launch of my blog soon!
Blessings to you all and welcome all of my new readers!
-Liza
Good Morning All!
My girls went downstairs to play so, I have a quick moment alone so, thought I would seize the moment and blog!
Have you ever been so confused with your life you just sit there and go hmmmmm? As many of you know, we have been having problems with our son in school again this year! After having a good year last year, he is back to stressing out and lashing out in school and it is breaking my heart. My son has a hard exterior but, is quite fragile on the inside. It is hard to see him lashing out like a caged animal.
I know how he feels truly know. When I get the feeling like I am trapped or just completely overwhelmed with stress I tend to lash out too. It is a horrible feeling because you really do feel like a caged animal and you just sort of 'snap' because you feel if you don't get out at that very moment you might never make it out. My son is experiencing that a lot lately and it is so hard to watch.
Yesterday I had a meeting with a bunch of the people involved with him at his school and expected to work out his schedule for me to home-school him starting in 2 weeks(just after spring break). They all sat there and told me pretty much flat out, "no" to homeschooling. They had an answer to every concern I had and while it felt good yesterday during the meeting, today I find myself upset that I caved. I am not sure if I caved or not but, I feel like I did.
So, now they are going to try doing a behavior test on him to see what triggers him, what his patterns are because as of right now, there truly don't seem to be any patterns or triggers. My question is, why didn't you do this behavior test that you need to 'observe' him for a length of time, back in October, November, December, January, or even February?! Why did you wait until AFTER I say I am pulling him out of school? Actually, they did mention the test at conferences in mid-February but, we went on vacation. But, I still believe all the paperwork should have been filled out and ready to go for his return from vacation!
This is my precious son you are talking about and my guy is so smart and way too smart to not like school and to not being doing well in school. He has a heart of gold and is really funny. It hurts me to the depths of my soul that he isn't able to find his place in 'life' yet. It hurts me even more that my husband and I were right, he needed the stability of being at the same school with the same teachers and same friends for a long period of time and that is why we had chosen Calvin for him and Calvin ended up not working for him. There are days I truly believe that he never stood a chance at that school because they didn't want to put in the effort. Because I have seen so many other children similar to Seth succeed there.
It is hard when your son is the one that absolutely WILL NOT give any respect to strangers or to those he doesn't know. Unfortunately for him and us you have to earn his respect but, once you have it, you have it. For our son to be switching schools a lot, to never see the same friends in the halls, to have different people around him all the time. It takes time to get to know the quirks of my son, he would have benefited so much from the stability of going to ONE school with the same friends and a small school.
Now, I see my son acting like a caged animal again, just clawing his way out and trying to escape a stressful situation that very few adults would be able to work through let alone an 8 year old boy. I will not stop fighting for that guy! He is my son, my only son and I KNOW he has a place in this life, I KNOW there is a school out there for him, I KNOW he will be successful someday and when it all comes together it will just sort of 'click' together and work.
It is hard being a parent! No one ever tells you your child might not fit in, they might not be successful in school no matter how hard you try and they might not have friends. Then, no one tells you they will eventually know they don't fit in, they know they aren't successful in school and they know they don't have friends and then, no one tells you how strong you have to be on the outside and how much your heart will break on the inside. No one tells you how you need to find strength you never knew you had to help your son and how much you have to be his advocate and how much you have to fight to give him the 'basics' that seem to come so easily to most children.
Well, I don't have any answers for any of you going through something similar but, I can tell you, right now I have this really strange peace surrounding me and I have this incredible 'ahhhhh' in me right now. I have absolutely no more answers than I had yesterday, really I only have more questions but, somehow, someway I am at peace with the not knowing and I feel light and like I am floating almost.
Truly, life seems to be crumbling all around me with my son's education, his school situation and a lot of other things I just am not ready to share yet and I have undeniable peace about everything. I feel like I am walking on air or like I am being held up and all I can think of is the footprints poem. For I know Jesus is carrying me right now, he is holding me and carrying me through this time in my life and not letting me go it alone and is taking the burden off of me. It is incredibly hard to explain if you haven't felt it before but, Praise God because looking at what is happening to our lives right now on paper, they are falling apart yet, not only me but, my husband too...we are being carried right through it all.
Blessings to you all!
-Liza
Here is a copy of one of the Footprints poems:
Good Evening All!
I am not sure how much time I have to write as it really is past my children's bedtimes and they are ALL still up. It's almost summer isn't it? They can stay up late right? UGH, remind me I said that tomorrow morning when they are all whining and tired from not enough sleep.
So, without going into too much detail, my life and my family life seems to be in upheaval lately. Things at my husband's company are really weird right now, my son and his school seems to be even weirder and to top it all off, people seem to be contacting me out of the woodwork for odd reasons. God, what are you doing in my life right now?! Where are you leading me, my husband and our family?!
To top everything off, I am sure Steve and I should be stressed out but, oddly, we are at peace, unexplainable peace. Truly, I haven't felt this kind of peace since I was un-married and pregnant with out my baby's father anywhere in sight and I had really no job...yet I had an unexplainable peace. I was calm, I wasn't upset, I was peaceful. Same here now. Truly I feel like I am almost floating along, it is a really weird feeling. Almost an out of body type feeling.
God seems to truly be at work in my life right now, I am definitely feeling his hand guide me and my family. To where, I have no idea but, he is in control and I am releasing all control to him. It is a very freeing experience! I keep thinking I should be nervous, afraid of the unknown, I feel like I should be panicking at times, I feel like, there is no reason I should have any sort of peace in my life yet, I do.
Have you ever just let God control everything in your life? It is weird, just last week I was feeling so disconnected with the Lord, I specifically remember praying to him last week that I needed his guidance and I needed to feel him again because I was feeling so far away from him and I wanted him to bring me back close to him. Well, be careful for what you pray for because here I am life is stressful, seemingly falling apart in many areas and yet here is God walking, guiding, and leading me and my husband every step of the way.
I have NO idea where God is going to lead us now but, he has never failed us, he has never left us and he has always been faithful and he has always provided. I trust in him and now, like an amusement park ride through a maze of ups and downs and turns and darkness leading into bright lights, God is ever faithful and carrying me through life.
Thank you God for protecting us once again and I don't know where you are taking me or my husband but, I know you have a plan. You are putting great people into our lives, you are opening up many doors and I know you will help us decide which is the right door to go through for our next phase in life, whatever that is.
I love God and I am in awe of his grace and peace!
Blessings to you all!
-Liza
I am a stay at home mom with 4 children ages 8, 7, 6 and 1 1/2.
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